Be A Legacy would like to celebrate you!
The gift of your friendship, acceptance and compassion have been truly rewarding. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your life and your growth. I hope these gifts I offer below will let you know how much I celebrate you.
Many people celebrate the 12 Days of Christmas as the 12 days leading up to Christmas Day. The true 12 Days of Christmas actually came as the 12 days after Christmas and began December 26 with the feast of St. Stephen-a traditional day for giving leftovers to the poor and ending January 6 with Epiphany. Each day a gift was presented to the world with celebrations to serve others in the world.
Following in the tradition of the original 12 Days of Christmas I would like to offer you some special gifts to keep you moving forward in life.
THE 12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS GIFTS BE A LEGACY GAVE TO ME...
12 Millionaire Quotes To Read (Dec.26)
11 Networking Tips For Growth (Dec.27)
10 Ways To Increase Your Confidence (Dec.28)
9 Powerful Life Questions (Dec.29)
8 Affirmations (Dec.30)
7 Key Areas Of Focus (Dec.31)
6 Ways Of Getting Out of Debt (Jan. 1)
5 Goal Setting Strategies (Jan.2)
4 Personality Quadrant Breakdown (Jan.3)
3 Articles On Relationships (Jan.4)
2 Visual Boards To Create (Jan.5)
and a Life Assessment Form (Jan.6)
Sign Up To Receive the 12 Days Of Christmas Gifts From Be A Legacy For A Chance To Win
A Prize Gift Pack Prize Gift Pack Includes:Books, Audio CD's, Business Tools, Special Gifts & More. (Value over $600) Prize Pack will be sent to winner on January 9, 09
Sign up today to receive these free gifts from Be A Legacy
email dreamteam@bealegacy.com or go to http://www.bealegacy.com/ and sign up to receive these great tools.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Friday, December 5, 2008
The Goal!
The goal is to build others up! This Includes You!
I am putting out this dare to you, me and anyone willing to take this dare on. I dare you to get up in the morning, look in the mirror and say “good morning you caring, compassionate and confident man/woman”. Really take yourself on when you first rise to meet the world.
Notice throughout the day what you have done well for the day and tell yourself the greatness you stepped into for the day. Find something you did right. “I gave my all today” or “I honored myself today”. Find ways to recognize that you made a difference for this day.
I am not a finished product and neither are you. We are both still learning to be better at life. Today I am better then I was yesterday. This year I am better than last year. As I learn more about me and what makes a difference in the world around me I can not help but be a better person today than yesterday.
Are there people around you that are confident and make a difference? What do you admire about them? Would you like to bring that person into your life closer to you so you can learn from them? If there is not anyone in your life like this right now, I would say it is time to seek them out! Bring people into your life that challenge you and show you how to get to a new area in your heart.
There may be many people who look to you as the person they admire. Are you giving them your best? Are you leading them in the direction that would move them forward? People are always watching us. Some possibly out of admiration and some possibly out of envy. How are you watching others? Are you coming from admiration or envy? When your goal is to lift others up, including yourself there is not time for envy. Who is the person that others admire when they see you in action?
If you can see the great value in others why then do you not see it for your self? Are you looking to the outside world for validation and approval? If that is the case what will you do about it? Are you ready to take yourself on? Is it time to start self validating? Our inner critic has a habit of taking us to the outside world. The things we did not do so well. Areas we have not had much practice in and expect to be perfect at it. It’s time to teach our inner critic to notice the great things about us and help others teach their inner critic the same.
Have you noticed how the negative voices always talk the loudest? It is time to notice what we are doing well and speak over the louder voices. When you do something good, talk over those loud voices! Change the language you speak to yourself. Shift messages like “I wish I had …” to “I am grateful I have…” or “I should have…” to “I can do…”.
Shifting your language will support you in learning to silence the critic more often and you can life a more fulfilled life.
So go on, dare yourself to be better today than you were yesterday! Set a goal to lift yourself up and bring others with you!
I am putting out this dare to you, me and anyone willing to take this dare on. I dare you to get up in the morning, look in the mirror and say “good morning you caring, compassionate and confident man/woman”. Really take yourself on when you first rise to meet the world.
Notice throughout the day what you have done well for the day and tell yourself the greatness you stepped into for the day. Find something you did right. “I gave my all today” or “I honored myself today”. Find ways to recognize that you made a difference for this day.
I am not a finished product and neither are you. We are both still learning to be better at life. Today I am better then I was yesterday. This year I am better than last year. As I learn more about me and what makes a difference in the world around me I can not help but be a better person today than yesterday.
Are there people around you that are confident and make a difference? What do you admire about them? Would you like to bring that person into your life closer to you so you can learn from them? If there is not anyone in your life like this right now, I would say it is time to seek them out! Bring people into your life that challenge you and show you how to get to a new area in your heart.
There may be many people who look to you as the person they admire. Are you giving them your best? Are you leading them in the direction that would move them forward? People are always watching us. Some possibly out of admiration and some possibly out of envy. How are you watching others? Are you coming from admiration or envy? When your goal is to lift others up, including yourself there is not time for envy. Who is the person that others admire when they see you in action?
If you can see the great value in others why then do you not see it for your self? Are you looking to the outside world for validation and approval? If that is the case what will you do about it? Are you ready to take yourself on? Is it time to start self validating? Our inner critic has a habit of taking us to the outside world. The things we did not do so well. Areas we have not had much practice in and expect to be perfect at it. It’s time to teach our inner critic to notice the great things about us and help others teach their inner critic the same.
Have you noticed how the negative voices always talk the loudest? It is time to notice what we are doing well and speak over the louder voices. When you do something good, talk over those loud voices! Change the language you speak to yourself. Shift messages like “I wish I had …” to “I am grateful I have…” or “I should have…” to “I can do…”.
Shifting your language will support you in learning to silence the critic more often and you can life a more fulfilled life.
So go on, dare yourself to be better today than you were yesterday! Set a goal to lift yourself up and bring others with you!
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Do you feel like your kids are pulling you down in life?
I have spoken with many people who have made comments like “if it wasn’t for my kids I would be able to do what I want in life” or “I can’t do that because I have kids”. I am a mother of four and I do not ever recall making those kinds of statements in regards to my life. Nor have I blamed my children for my challenges and hardships. I will say at times it was challenging to find a babysitter for four. There were times in which I had to make a choice to not attend something because I did not have a babysitter. And I know that it was my choice to make.
I have never once felt like my children were ever a burden! We have had challenges along the way. I do not have the most successful kids on the block. We have been through serious illnesses and challenges at school. I do have pretty confident kids and the conversations I have with my kids have been powerful and eye opening for me. When my teens have struggles they come and talk to me. When my young adult son feels challenged or lonely he talks to me. My young daughter tells me what is bothering her and about the boys she wants to go to dances with when she is older.
I recently read an article from Nebraska where parents are dropping off their adolescent to teenage kids to the safe haven. One father who flew from Miami and left his teen behind at the “safe haven”. That tears at my heart. One day I hope to adopt a young girl into our family. I was asking myself what would cause a parent to bring their children at these ages to a “Safe Haven” and just leave them there? Is it because they can not put food on the table? Is it because the children are difficult to handle because the parent was negligent in raising them confidently? Is it because of medical issues that the parent can not afford? Have we as a society let the TV and video games be the babysitter in our busy lives and still expected confident kids? When crisis comes to our homes how are we handling it? Will we abandon those people we are responsible for? Are we seeking support from family, friends, neighbors and our community? I know for some communities times are challenging. How are people reaching for help and support through the tough times?
Raising confident kids is not an easy or simple thing to do! It takes effort from parents, family members and the community. Teaching kids to be confident is very deliberate. Everyday make time to talk with your kids, challenge them to come up with solutions to their problems verses giving them the answer. When I do give solutions I offer several for them to choose from, allowing them to build up their trust to make the right choices in life. Everyday my kids are asked some simple questions like “What are you thankful for?” and “What do you like about yourself?”. Asking questions like these allows them to look at what is important to them and be confident in their answers.
One day my son came home from school and asked me “Mom would you be really mad if I beat someone up?” of course I said yes. Then I asked him what was going on. He shared with me how everyday this one young man kept telling him he was a terrible football player and bad quarterback. He was belittling him in front of the other kids at school, tough time for 13 year olds. I asked my son if he really wanted to beat him up and he said no. I asked him what did he want to see happen. My son told me he just wanted the other boy to stop making comments like that because he was working hard to be a good football player. The solution we came up together was the next time the boy made a comment my son would ask this question “Since you think I am not good at playing football will you step up and teach me how to be better?’. The next day in school he had the opportunity to use his solution. The other boy made comments and my son stepped into action. The results were the other boy told my son he was a good player and apologized for making the comments to impress his friends. They are now friends and work as a team. Are we teaching our kids to be responsible for the things that challenge them? Or just waiting for our kids to get over frustrated and allow violence to be the solution. Or abandon the kids because as a parent we were not willing to be involved.
I asked my sons how they would feel at 13 and 16 to be left at a “safe haven”. They said they will feel like they were not loved and would be very sad and hurt. Imagine what those teens that have been abandoned feel as they have been left at the hospitals in Nebraska. Image if it was you who had been left. How would you feel? As I look back at my childhood, my parents taught me many things in life. Confidence was not one of them. I learned that as I got older. I was taught that as a child I had no say in decisions. I learned that a child can go to bed without supper now and again and would still survive. I learned that pain does hurt and emotional hurts make a bigger scar. Even though I did not often feel loved by my parents it would have been much more difficult to have been abandoned. I love my parents and know that they too had challenges raising four kids.
I traveled to Uganda, Africa last year where many parents are dying from Aids and the kids are working together as a team to build each other up because the parents are very sick and dying. I was able to see the poor conditions these children live in, the huts they live in and the lack of food and healthcare. The babies that were thrown on trash piles and left in public restrooms because of the rapes and lack of food. Yet the people in Uganda that I experienced were not afraid to ask for help. There is enough in America and many times pride will get in our way and stop us from asking for help.
I strive everyday to build the confidence of people around me. I have learned that most people just want to feel like they belong somewhere. Most people want to be part of a family and community. Many times judgment and a feeling of not being accepted push people away and create a feeling of not being loved. Gangs are about being a part of a community. I am choosing to have my family and friends to be part of a community without violence and without hurting others. It is never too late to start building confidence in kids. It is never too late to build confidence as an adult. What are you going to do to build up the confidence in parents so during crisis they choose to get help and support and not abandon the children in their lives? I will offer classes and speak to groups and do what is necessary to help stop the abandonment and violence towards the kids in the world. It is time to step up in the tough times and say people matter first! The time is here to be deliberate with those we are responsible for. Are you willing?
I have never once felt like my children were ever a burden! We have had challenges along the way. I do not have the most successful kids on the block. We have been through serious illnesses and challenges at school. I do have pretty confident kids and the conversations I have with my kids have been powerful and eye opening for me. When my teens have struggles they come and talk to me. When my young adult son feels challenged or lonely he talks to me. My young daughter tells me what is bothering her and about the boys she wants to go to dances with when she is older.
I recently read an article from Nebraska where parents are dropping off their adolescent to teenage kids to the safe haven. One father who flew from Miami and left his teen behind at the “safe haven”. That tears at my heart. One day I hope to adopt a young girl into our family. I was asking myself what would cause a parent to bring their children at these ages to a “Safe Haven” and just leave them there? Is it because they can not put food on the table? Is it because the children are difficult to handle because the parent was negligent in raising them confidently? Is it because of medical issues that the parent can not afford? Have we as a society let the TV and video games be the babysitter in our busy lives and still expected confident kids? When crisis comes to our homes how are we handling it? Will we abandon those people we are responsible for? Are we seeking support from family, friends, neighbors and our community? I know for some communities times are challenging. How are people reaching for help and support through the tough times?
Raising confident kids is not an easy or simple thing to do! It takes effort from parents, family members and the community. Teaching kids to be confident is very deliberate. Everyday make time to talk with your kids, challenge them to come up with solutions to their problems verses giving them the answer. When I do give solutions I offer several for them to choose from, allowing them to build up their trust to make the right choices in life. Everyday my kids are asked some simple questions like “What are you thankful for?” and “What do you like about yourself?”. Asking questions like these allows them to look at what is important to them and be confident in their answers.
One day my son came home from school and asked me “Mom would you be really mad if I beat someone up?” of course I said yes. Then I asked him what was going on. He shared with me how everyday this one young man kept telling him he was a terrible football player and bad quarterback. He was belittling him in front of the other kids at school, tough time for 13 year olds. I asked my son if he really wanted to beat him up and he said no. I asked him what did he want to see happen. My son told me he just wanted the other boy to stop making comments like that because he was working hard to be a good football player. The solution we came up together was the next time the boy made a comment my son would ask this question “Since you think I am not good at playing football will you step up and teach me how to be better?’. The next day in school he had the opportunity to use his solution. The other boy made comments and my son stepped into action. The results were the other boy told my son he was a good player and apologized for making the comments to impress his friends. They are now friends and work as a team. Are we teaching our kids to be responsible for the things that challenge them? Or just waiting for our kids to get over frustrated and allow violence to be the solution. Or abandon the kids because as a parent we were not willing to be involved.
I asked my sons how they would feel at 13 and 16 to be left at a “safe haven”. They said they will feel like they were not loved and would be very sad and hurt. Imagine what those teens that have been abandoned feel as they have been left at the hospitals in Nebraska. Image if it was you who had been left. How would you feel? As I look back at my childhood, my parents taught me many things in life. Confidence was not one of them. I learned that as I got older. I was taught that as a child I had no say in decisions. I learned that a child can go to bed without supper now and again and would still survive. I learned that pain does hurt and emotional hurts make a bigger scar. Even though I did not often feel loved by my parents it would have been much more difficult to have been abandoned. I love my parents and know that they too had challenges raising four kids.
I traveled to Uganda, Africa last year where many parents are dying from Aids and the kids are working together as a team to build each other up because the parents are very sick and dying. I was able to see the poor conditions these children live in, the huts they live in and the lack of food and healthcare. The babies that were thrown on trash piles and left in public restrooms because of the rapes and lack of food. Yet the people in Uganda that I experienced were not afraid to ask for help. There is enough in America and many times pride will get in our way and stop us from asking for help.
I strive everyday to build the confidence of people around me. I have learned that most people just want to feel like they belong somewhere. Most people want to be part of a family and community. Many times judgment and a feeling of not being accepted push people away and create a feeling of not being loved. Gangs are about being a part of a community. I am choosing to have my family and friends to be part of a community without violence and without hurting others. It is never too late to start building confidence in kids. It is never too late to build confidence as an adult. What are you going to do to build up the confidence in parents so during crisis they choose to get help and support and not abandon the children in their lives? I will offer classes and speak to groups and do what is necessary to help stop the abandonment and violence towards the kids in the world. It is time to step up in the tough times and say people matter first! The time is here to be deliberate with those we are responsible for. Are you willing?
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Do You Know If Your Life Is In Balance?
Do you address the issues and find balance in your life?
What are the key areas in your life that you may want to set goals and address concerns around?
I see 7 Key Areas of Focus in life that unless all are in alignment can create the space of being out of balance. I would like to share with you the 7 Key Areas of Focus that may entice you to look deeper into your life and create a more balanced life.
Key 1: Self & Contribution – Who you are matters in the world! How you contribute to others and yourself is your greatest asset. Your attitude in life will either move you forward or hold you back. How do you talk to yourself? Do you feel you are making a contribution in your life?
Key 2: Work & Career – What you to do to make a living matters! What matters is how much you enjoy your work & career. You may want to evaluate your thoughts and feelings around work. Are you satisfied? Do you want to make a bigger difference?
Key 3: Relationships – Who you connect with matters! Have you ever stopped to really think about all the relationships in your life? How do you see those around you? Have you clearly defined your circle of friends? Are there relationships you would like to improve? Are there relationships you may need to let go of because they are toxic?
Key 4: Money & Finances – How you honor your money & finances matter! Have you taken an inventory of your money and finances? Do you avoid looking because it may not be where you want it? What is your income? What are your debts? What is your plan to manage your money & finances? Do you even have a plan?
Key 5: Spirituality – Your sense of meaning and purpose matter! Do you know the deepest parts of you? Religion, nature, art, meditation and pray are just a few ways to express spirituality. What is spirituality for you? How do you bring out your best through your spirituality? What do you do on a regular basis that shows your faith spiritually?
Key 6: Health & Fitness – How you feel in your body matters! How do you take care of your health & fitness? What do you do regularly that takes care of your health? How are your food choices? Do you get enough exercise and sleep? How do you envision your health and fitness? How do you handle stress?
Key 7: Fun & Recreation – How you have fun and re-create yourself matters! When was the last time you feel you truly had fun? What were you experiencing that made it fun? Have you made a list of all the things you love to do? When was the last time you did one of the things on your list? Is it time to do something fun and re-create yourself?
When I have balanced myself in these 7 Key Areas of Focus I find that my life runs a lot smoother.
I take responsibility for my life, my actions and my outcomes. As I am more balanced I enjoy myself, my career, my relationships, my finances, my faith in spirit, my health is important and I have a lot of fun!
Where are you at in each of the 7 Key areas of Focus?
What actions would you choose to create more balance in your life?
How is your legacy in the world around balance?
If you would like support contact dreamteam@bealegacy.com
What are the key areas in your life that you may want to set goals and address concerns around?
I see 7 Key Areas of Focus in life that unless all are in alignment can create the space of being out of balance. I would like to share with you the 7 Key Areas of Focus that may entice you to look deeper into your life and create a more balanced life.
Key 1: Self & Contribution – Who you are matters in the world! How you contribute to others and yourself is your greatest asset. Your attitude in life will either move you forward or hold you back. How do you talk to yourself? Do you feel you are making a contribution in your life?
Key 2: Work & Career – What you to do to make a living matters! What matters is how much you enjoy your work & career. You may want to evaluate your thoughts and feelings around work. Are you satisfied? Do you want to make a bigger difference?
Key 3: Relationships – Who you connect with matters! Have you ever stopped to really think about all the relationships in your life? How do you see those around you? Have you clearly defined your circle of friends? Are there relationships you would like to improve? Are there relationships you may need to let go of because they are toxic?
Key 4: Money & Finances – How you honor your money & finances matter! Have you taken an inventory of your money and finances? Do you avoid looking because it may not be where you want it? What is your income? What are your debts? What is your plan to manage your money & finances? Do you even have a plan?
Key 5: Spirituality – Your sense of meaning and purpose matter! Do you know the deepest parts of you? Religion, nature, art, meditation and pray are just a few ways to express spirituality. What is spirituality for you? How do you bring out your best through your spirituality? What do you do on a regular basis that shows your faith spiritually?
Key 6: Health & Fitness – How you feel in your body matters! How do you take care of your health & fitness? What do you do regularly that takes care of your health? How are your food choices? Do you get enough exercise and sleep? How do you envision your health and fitness? How do you handle stress?
Key 7: Fun & Recreation – How you have fun and re-create yourself matters! When was the last time you feel you truly had fun? What were you experiencing that made it fun? Have you made a list of all the things you love to do? When was the last time you did one of the things on your list? Is it time to do something fun and re-create yourself?
When I have balanced myself in these 7 Key Areas of Focus I find that my life runs a lot smoother.
I take responsibility for my life, my actions and my outcomes. As I am more balanced I enjoy myself, my career, my relationships, my finances, my faith in spirit, my health is important and I have a lot of fun!
Where are you at in each of the 7 Key areas of Focus?
What actions would you choose to create more balance in your life?
How is your legacy in the world around balance?
If you would like support contact dreamteam@bealegacy.com
Friday, September 26, 2008
What Price Are You Paying For Leaving Yourself Out?
What price are you paying for leaving yourself out of your life?
Something to think about! Might be a great topic to journal on.
Are you so wrapped up in your life and all the tasks that you are leaving yourself out of your intimate life? If you feel that you are leaving yourself out what will you do today to step in and be all of you? What are the prices and benefits to leaving you out?
If you feel you are playing full out I say wonderful! Are you bringing someone along with you and are they playing full out? What are the prices and benefits for playing full out? What are the prices and benefits to bringing others along with you?
There have been many days that I have found myself so busy with task that I have left all of who I am out of the day. I can get locked into the tasks that I will focus more on that than how I feel or how those around me feel.
I invite you to join with me and do a self check. Where am I today? What am I feeling? Is today a task day? Is today a connection day?
Who will I become today by getting the tasks done?
Who will I become today by making connections today?
What ever you choose is just great! I say be aware of your days and choose your days to serve you. Do not create the space where you are always serving the tasks and not allowing yourself to be served too.
Task Day or Connection Day - What will you choose?
You matter! You deserve a wonderful life!
I say "keep questioning yourself and living up to your legacy because it all matters". You can go to www.bealegacy.com and sign up for our FREE Newsletter "The Buzz" and stay on the questioning path in life.
Be Blessed and Keep Making a Difference!
Something to think about! Might be a great topic to journal on.
Are you so wrapped up in your life and all the tasks that you are leaving yourself out of your intimate life? If you feel that you are leaving yourself out what will you do today to step in and be all of you? What are the prices and benefits to leaving you out?
If you feel you are playing full out I say wonderful! Are you bringing someone along with you and are they playing full out? What are the prices and benefits for playing full out? What are the prices and benefits to bringing others along with you?
There have been many days that I have found myself so busy with task that I have left all of who I am out of the day. I can get locked into the tasks that I will focus more on that than how I feel or how those around me feel.
I invite you to join with me and do a self check. Where am I today? What am I feeling? Is today a task day? Is today a connection day?
Who will I become today by getting the tasks done?
Who will I become today by making connections today?
What ever you choose is just great! I say be aware of your days and choose your days to serve you. Do not create the space where you are always serving the tasks and not allowing yourself to be served too.
Task Day or Connection Day - What will you choose?
You matter! You deserve a wonderful life!
I say "keep questioning yourself and living up to your legacy because it all matters". You can go to www.bealegacy.com and sign up for our FREE Newsletter "The Buzz" and stay on the questioning path in life.
Be Blessed and Keep Making a Difference!
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Legacy Mentor Program Tele-Class Topic Schedule Dates
When you join the Legacy Mentor Program you will start receiving Daily Legacy Steps, Legacy Tips, Access to all Tele-Classes, Call times for One-On-One's with CEO, Articles and more. Let Be A Legacy support you in continued growth.
Legacy Mentor Program Tele-Class Schedule
October 9, 2008 - Qualities of Leader/Core Values
October 21, 2008 - Prices & Benefits/Consequences
November 13, 2008 - Recovery Time
November 25, 2008 - Self Honoring
December 11, 2008 - Giving/Receiving
December 22, 2008 - Goal Setting "SMARTER" Goals
January 8, 2009 - Visioning
January 20, 2009 - Deserving Money
You will get the opportunity to challenge yourself & reflect on your life up to this point. By taking action steps you can also create your future success. Together we can team up & share information that may enhance your business relationships, personal relationships, relationships with children and future relationships.
$35.00 a month to receive all the benefits of the Legacy Mentor Program. What value will you place on your continued growth? Contact us for payment options or sign up through Paypal and start taking action today on who you will become in 2008. dreamteam@bealegacy.com
Legacy Mentor Program Tele-Class Schedule
October 9, 2008 - Qualities of Leader/Core Values
October 21, 2008 - Prices & Benefits/Consequences
November 13, 2008 - Recovery Time
November 25, 2008 - Self Honoring
December 11, 2008 - Giving/Receiving
December 22, 2008 - Goal Setting "SMARTER" Goals
January 8, 2009 - Visioning
January 20, 2009 - Deserving Money
You will get the opportunity to challenge yourself & reflect on your life up to this point. By taking action steps you can also create your future success. Together we can team up & share information that may enhance your business relationships, personal relationships, relationships with children and future relationships.
$35.00 a month to receive all the benefits of the Legacy Mentor Program. What value will you place on your continued growth? Contact us for payment options or sign up through Paypal and start taking action today on who you will become in 2008. dreamteam@bealegacy.com
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Legacy Mentor Program
New Launch
Be A Legacy Mentor Program
Be A Legacy Mentor Program is an opportunity for ongoing coaching and consulting that will keep you moving forward by implementing, holding you accountable and teaching you new ideas every month for your business and personal success. Have someone to fall back on to support you as questions or concerns arise in your business and personal life.
Your monthly membership price of $35 gives you access to the Be A Legacy Monthly Tele-Classes, Monthly Call-In Days (One on One calls with CEO Kimberley Borgens), Monthly Newsletters, Monthly Legacy Tips (Monthly emailed thoughts and questions to ponder on.), Daily Legacy Steps (Daily email that allow you to journal, take action on and create new for your life.), Articles, Email Support and More.
Your membership is $35 a month and you can cancel at anytime. Are you ready to take your business and/or your personal life to the next level? Sign up today to start creating more value in your life. Why wait to take on your life?
Note: Business Consulting and Coaching Clients who sign up for our 8 Week Program receive the Legacy Mentor Program Free for 2 Months. Are you open to become a Consultant/Coaching Client?
It is easy to set up! Contact is at dreamteam@bealegacy.com and we can get you set up with your credit card or Paypal. (Contact us if these payment option will not support you and you are ready to sign up. We are open to working with you!)
This is a Great Gift idea also. Is there someone in your life you would like to gift this monthly program to? We can even send an e-gift for them anonymously.
You will be emailed with advance notice of all Tele-Classes and the Monthly Call-In Days. Put them in your calendar and prepare to get excited in your life.
Monthly Tele-Classes will be published with the time and date. You can join in on the call and listen to topics such as Confidence Building, Goal Setting, Goal Accountability, Competing Commitments, Belief Systems, Qualities & Attributes, Community Involvement and much more. Some of our Tele-Classes may have Special Guests join in and offer new ideas and suggestions.
The Monthly Call-In Day is when CEO Kimberley Borgens sets a day where you can call in any time during the set time frame and ask what you like. You have the opportunity to pick her brain on information from goal setting, speaking, competing commitments, business systems, business consulting and much more that would move your business forward. How about personal family issues such as marriage, raising empowering leaders, trusting your intuition, discipline and consequences. You get to choose what to talk about that would move you and those around you forward in life.
What would hold you back from signing up? What beliefs are you ready to transform?
Ready, Set, Launch :)
Be A Legacy Mentor Program
Be A Legacy Mentor Program is an opportunity for ongoing coaching and consulting that will keep you moving forward by implementing, holding you accountable and teaching you new ideas every month for your business and personal success. Have someone to fall back on to support you as questions or concerns arise in your business and personal life.
Your monthly membership price of $35 gives you access to the Be A Legacy Monthly Tele-Classes, Monthly Call-In Days (One on One calls with CEO Kimberley Borgens), Monthly Newsletters, Monthly Legacy Tips (Monthly emailed thoughts and questions to ponder on.), Daily Legacy Steps (Daily email that allow you to journal, take action on and create new for your life.), Articles, Email Support and More.
Your membership is $35 a month and you can cancel at anytime. Are you ready to take your business and/or your personal life to the next level? Sign up today to start creating more value in your life. Why wait to take on your life?
Note: Business Consulting and Coaching Clients who sign up for our 8 Week Program receive the Legacy Mentor Program Free for 2 Months. Are you open to become a Consultant/Coaching Client?
It is easy to set up! Contact is at dreamteam@bealegacy.com and we can get you set up with your credit card or Paypal. (Contact us if these payment option will not support you and you are ready to sign up. We are open to working with you!)
This is a Great Gift idea also. Is there someone in your life you would like to gift this monthly program to? We can even send an e-gift for them anonymously.
You will be emailed with advance notice of all Tele-Classes and the Monthly Call-In Days. Put them in your calendar and prepare to get excited in your life.
Monthly Tele-Classes will be published with the time and date. You can join in on the call and listen to topics such as Confidence Building, Goal Setting, Goal Accountability, Competing Commitments, Belief Systems, Qualities & Attributes, Community Involvement and much more. Some of our Tele-Classes may have Special Guests join in and offer new ideas and suggestions.
The Monthly Call-In Day is when CEO Kimberley Borgens sets a day where you can call in any time during the set time frame and ask what you like. You have the opportunity to pick her brain on information from goal setting, speaking, competing commitments, business systems, business consulting and much more that would move your business forward. How about personal family issues such as marriage, raising empowering leaders, trusting your intuition, discipline and consequences. You get to choose what to talk about that would move you and those around you forward in life.
What would hold you back from signing up? What beliefs are you ready to transform?
Ready, Set, Launch :)
Do You Limit Your Power?
The only limits of power are in the boundaries of our beliefs. Our beliefs are the most powerful leading forces that effect our behaviour and leadership. The statement "You change you life when you change your mind" is saying when you shift your beliefs you are likely to shift your life.
Your beliefs either empower you and push you forward or they hold your back in life and take away your power.
What really is a belief and how did we come about them? A belief is something that we accepted to be true or real. Now we may not know for certain that it is true we just believe that it is and therefore we have formed our belief system. We mentally accept that it is true and then carry on in our daily habits that it is true. We build confidence around the belief in the truth as we know it and we can even convince others in our belief as well. We will base our experiences around our beliefs.
Think about some of the beliefs that others have convinced us of because they were confident in their belief. "Men should be at work not at home with the kids." "Women are not reliable CEO's because they should focus on their family." How about this one "Women should not be vice president" or "Black men should not be president". One of those two beliefs is about to shift. One way or another we will have a black president or a woman vice president. What about our traditions? How we celebrate traditions in our family are they conscious or are they a subconscious beliefs. Do you celebrate Thanksgiving the same way your parents did? How about Christmas? Did you adjust to share beliefs with your spouse? Did you create your own traditions? Will your kids do it your way because you tell them this is the way it is to be done?
Today how about assessing your beliefs and ask yourself if your beliefs are from your parents, community, education, religion or your very own. Ask yourself some conscious questions.
Do my beliefs empower me or do they limit me from moving forward?
Do my beliefs support me in risk taking?
Do my beliefs support my family in moving forward?
Do my beliefs allow me to enjoy the work I do?
Now that you have started asking and assessing your beliefs is it time to make a shift in your life? Transform what you once believed to be true to the possibility that you could view your belief a little different. Maybe not so much confidence in the belief yet more confidence in you empowering new possibilities in your life.
The four areas of our lives to create balance in are Physical, Mental, Emotional and Financial. So how are you prepared to transform your life in these areas?
Are you physically fit to manage transformation? Do you exercise regularly? Do you get enough sleep? Do you eat a healthy diet that gives you steady energy?
Are you mentally fit to manage transformation? Do you routinely sharpen your mental skills? Do you learn new things in business and personally? Are you open to new ideas? Do you get involved with discussions in business and in your community?
Are you emotionally fit to manage transformation? Do you continually work on cleaning up the past hurts? Do you get clear with relationships that you still have energy with? Do you heal the wounds of your past where you felt hurt? Do you let negative remarks beat you down or do you let them be feedback and look to see if it would serve you to make a shift or not.
Are you financially fit to manage transformation? Are you living paycheck to paycheck or above your means? Are you enjoying your job or business or do you dread going to work everyday? Could shifting how you look at work improve your paycheck? Do you have money in savings? Are you tithing?
Transforming your consciousness around your beliefs is the first step to making shifts in your life. When you focus on your belief "Shift Happens"!
Are you ready to make some shifts?
(Note: The word Transformation creates a sense of moving forward and excitement in life. The word Change creates a sense or hard, dread and resistance.)
Are you ready to transform your beliefs and use your power in making choices that will move you forward?
Your beliefs either empower you and push you forward or they hold your back in life and take away your power.
What really is a belief and how did we come about them? A belief is something that we accepted to be true or real. Now we may not know for certain that it is true we just believe that it is and therefore we have formed our belief system. We mentally accept that it is true and then carry on in our daily habits that it is true. We build confidence around the belief in the truth as we know it and we can even convince others in our belief as well. We will base our experiences around our beliefs.
Think about some of the beliefs that others have convinced us of because they were confident in their belief. "Men should be at work not at home with the kids." "Women are not reliable CEO's because they should focus on their family." How about this one "Women should not be vice president" or "Black men should not be president". One of those two beliefs is about to shift. One way or another we will have a black president or a woman vice president. What about our traditions? How we celebrate traditions in our family are they conscious or are they a subconscious beliefs. Do you celebrate Thanksgiving the same way your parents did? How about Christmas? Did you adjust to share beliefs with your spouse? Did you create your own traditions? Will your kids do it your way because you tell them this is the way it is to be done?
Today how about assessing your beliefs and ask yourself if your beliefs are from your parents, community, education, religion or your very own. Ask yourself some conscious questions.
Do my beliefs empower me or do they limit me from moving forward?
Do my beliefs support me in risk taking?
Do my beliefs support my family in moving forward?
Do my beliefs allow me to enjoy the work I do?
Now that you have started asking and assessing your beliefs is it time to make a shift in your life? Transform what you once believed to be true to the possibility that you could view your belief a little different. Maybe not so much confidence in the belief yet more confidence in you empowering new possibilities in your life.
The four areas of our lives to create balance in are Physical, Mental, Emotional and Financial. So how are you prepared to transform your life in these areas?
Are you physically fit to manage transformation? Do you exercise regularly? Do you get enough sleep? Do you eat a healthy diet that gives you steady energy?
Are you mentally fit to manage transformation? Do you routinely sharpen your mental skills? Do you learn new things in business and personally? Are you open to new ideas? Do you get involved with discussions in business and in your community?
Are you emotionally fit to manage transformation? Do you continually work on cleaning up the past hurts? Do you get clear with relationships that you still have energy with? Do you heal the wounds of your past where you felt hurt? Do you let negative remarks beat you down or do you let them be feedback and look to see if it would serve you to make a shift or not.
Are you financially fit to manage transformation? Are you living paycheck to paycheck or above your means? Are you enjoying your job or business or do you dread going to work everyday? Could shifting how you look at work improve your paycheck? Do you have money in savings? Are you tithing?
Transforming your consciousness around your beliefs is the first step to making shifts in your life. When you focus on your belief "Shift Happens"!
Are you ready to make some shifts?
(Note: The word Transformation creates a sense of moving forward and excitement in life. The word Change creates a sense or hard, dread and resistance.)
Are you ready to transform your beliefs and use your power in making choices that will move you forward?
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Am I Comparing Myself Fairly?
Do I compare myself fairly with others? I find I am frequently comparing myself to others. Not smart enough, not skinny enough, not strong enough, not talented enough, not relaxing enough, not disciplined enough, not brave enough and so on and so on!
Are you caught in this cycle of Not Enough? I am successful and powerful! I have accomplished many things in life as well as many lessons. I have moved up in business and have some wonderful personal relationships. Yet I still sometimes go to the not enough thoughts.
The question I would put out is this "What scale are you measuring yourself on?". Are you comparing yourself to a hope of perfection? Are your successes rarely enjoyed? Do you constantly have the drive that you must do or be better? Do you see something that you did not do well as a failure and then focus on that?
If I have given 100 percent of my skill and knowledge to a project and when it is complete I look back and see where I could have done things differently how do I treat myself? I can look back and decide that the job I did was only 97% worth and the 3% is what I would focus on as not enough.
Have I allowed the influence of others to determine who I am or "should" be? Have I allowed my parents limited skill, my family, spouse, community and culture define who I am?
Am I allowing things I heard in my youth and interpreted in my youth create a negative effect on me now in my adulthood? How are you doing in this area?
Now is the time to start comparing myself fairly! The next time we get in the mood to compare lets stop and see what scale we are using. When you are feeling like you are not enough ask what scale are you using. The perfection scale that does not really exist?
Start listing your achievements and compare them to others who are the same age, gender, social background and culture. Are you comparing your physical beauty to someone else that does not live in your body or your life style? Write down the differences. Notice the similarities and differences for yourself. Notice the negative comparisons you place on yourself and how much energy you put on worrying about them. If you were to release that energy and put it somewhere more productive where would you put it? In your relationships with your spouse, kids, friends or at work, your business? How about positively on yourself? How do you hold back the real you from playing full out because you do not see yourself as enough?
Some things to think about and journal on could be:
• Is it possible to accept myself and treat myself in a lovingly and compassionately, regardless of my accomplishments or lack of accomplishments?
• When did I decide I was not enough and why?
• Do I need to be outstanding, special or unique?
• Am I looking to prove something? And if so who?
• Why does failing at something transform me into being a failure?
• What would my life be like with a fair comparison?
• Can I be satisfied with progress, not perfection?
Final thought: Did you know that the composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart by th age of 12 was more successful by any standard in music composition. Mozart spoke 15 languages and had composed numerous major pieces of music, including an opera. He was still a child! I would not want to compare myself to that!
Are you caught in this cycle of Not Enough? I am successful and powerful! I have accomplished many things in life as well as many lessons. I have moved up in business and have some wonderful personal relationships. Yet I still sometimes go to the not enough thoughts.
The question I would put out is this "What scale are you measuring yourself on?". Are you comparing yourself to a hope of perfection? Are your successes rarely enjoyed? Do you constantly have the drive that you must do or be better? Do you see something that you did not do well as a failure and then focus on that?
If I have given 100 percent of my skill and knowledge to a project and when it is complete I look back and see where I could have done things differently how do I treat myself? I can look back and decide that the job I did was only 97% worth and the 3% is what I would focus on as not enough.
Have I allowed the influence of others to determine who I am or "should" be? Have I allowed my parents limited skill, my family, spouse, community and culture define who I am?
Am I allowing things I heard in my youth and interpreted in my youth create a negative effect on me now in my adulthood? How are you doing in this area?
Now is the time to start comparing myself fairly! The next time we get in the mood to compare lets stop and see what scale we are using. When you are feeling like you are not enough ask what scale are you using. The perfection scale that does not really exist?
Start listing your achievements and compare them to others who are the same age, gender, social background and culture. Are you comparing your physical beauty to someone else that does not live in your body or your life style? Write down the differences. Notice the similarities and differences for yourself. Notice the negative comparisons you place on yourself and how much energy you put on worrying about them. If you were to release that energy and put it somewhere more productive where would you put it? In your relationships with your spouse, kids, friends or at work, your business? How about positively on yourself? How do you hold back the real you from playing full out because you do not see yourself as enough?
Some things to think about and journal on could be:
• Is it possible to accept myself and treat myself in a lovingly and compassionately, regardless of my accomplishments or lack of accomplishments?
• When did I decide I was not enough and why?
• Do I need to be outstanding, special or unique?
• Am I looking to prove something? And if so who?
• Why does failing at something transform me into being a failure?
• What would my life be like with a fair comparison?
• Can I be satisfied with progress, not perfection?
Final thought: Did you know that the composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart by th age of 12 was more successful by any standard in music composition. Mozart spoke 15 languages and had composed numerous major pieces of music, including an opera. He was still a child! I would not want to compare myself to that!
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
How Coachable Am I?
Considering a business or personal coach?
The first question for you to ask yourself is. . . "How Coachable Am I?"
Are you really ready to ask this question of yourself?
Do you wonder how receptive you might be to coaching?
If you 're open and available to coaching you can be relied upon to take coaching seriously.
To be coachable you will believe this is the right time to accept coaching.
You tell the truth to yourself and are willing to challenge your self-defeating beliefs.
Being coachable means you are willing to do the work and let the coach do the coaching.
People who are coachable keep their word without struggling or sabotaging.
Coachable people experiment new ideas that the coach chooses for me.
A person who is coachable can express what they need or expect.
Sees coaching as a worthwhile investment in their life.
Is humble enough to share the credit for their success with the coach.
Knowing all of this are you "Coachable"?
The bonus is you can learn to be more coachable as you are being coached. Do not be alarmed and think you are not coachable if you do not see yourself in all of the statements above. As you allow yourself to be coached you will gain more ability to be receptive and open to coaching.
The greatest gift we can give ourselves is to allow ourselves to learn more about what challenges us and take action to be better at those challenges. Having a coach can support you with what challenges you. Allowing yourself to see through the eyes of someone who may see your challenge as a success tool for you.
Find a coach who will support you, hold you accountable and wants you to be a success. The best coach is a coach who has shown success in their life and business. Somene who walks the talk. Research and ask questions about the coach you are looking to hire. Then make a decision that would serve you in reaching your goals and dreams.
Contact Be A Legacy to see the successes they have had in business, personal relationships and their community.
The first question for you to ask yourself is. . . "How Coachable Am I?"
Are you really ready to ask this question of yourself?
Do you wonder how receptive you might be to coaching?
If you 're open and available to coaching you can be relied upon to take coaching seriously.
To be coachable you will believe this is the right time to accept coaching.
You tell the truth to yourself and are willing to challenge your self-defeating beliefs.
Being coachable means you are willing to do the work and let the coach do the coaching.
People who are coachable keep their word without struggling or sabotaging.
Coachable people experiment new ideas that the coach chooses for me.
A person who is coachable can express what they need or expect.
Sees coaching as a worthwhile investment in their life.
Is humble enough to share the credit for their success with the coach.
Knowing all of this are you "Coachable"?
The bonus is you can learn to be more coachable as you are being coached. Do not be alarmed and think you are not coachable if you do not see yourself in all of the statements above. As you allow yourself to be coached you will gain more ability to be receptive and open to coaching.
The greatest gift we can give ourselves is to allow ourselves to learn more about what challenges us and take action to be better at those challenges. Having a coach can support you with what challenges you. Allowing yourself to see through the eyes of someone who may see your challenge as a success tool for you.
Find a coach who will support you, hold you accountable and wants you to be a success. The best coach is a coach who has shown success in their life and business. Somene who walks the talk. Research and ask questions about the coach you are looking to hire. Then make a decision that would serve you in reaching your goals and dreams.
Contact Be A Legacy to see the successes they have had in business, personal relationships and their community.
Monday, September 1, 2008
September Legacy Foundation Day
Septembers Legacy Foundation Recipeint is the Women's Center of San Joaquin County.
Be A Legacy creates awareness with Legacy Foundation Day.
Legacy Foundation Day is an opportunity for you to receive a 30 minute coaching session for free. In turn, we ask you to make a contribution of $30.00 (or more, it's up to you) to the cause, organization, or individual we've chosen each month that we support because they are also making a huge difference in the world.
We choose to model how simple it is to walk the talk, take a stand, and do something for another. And we invite you to join us.
Here's how it works.
• Every month we'll highlight on our blog the month's charitable focus.
• You complete the 'Give to Receive' form on the Be A Legacy website to request your 30-minute coaching session.
• After receiving your form, you will be contacted by one of our Be A Legacy coaches to schedule your session.
• Your session must be scheduled within one week of your request.• After the session, please make your donation. Simple honor system applies.
Here is some information on the Women's Center:
For more than three decades, the Women's Center has been the lifeline to help and hope for thousands of women, children, and men in San Joaquin County, and now reaches over 30,000 individuals each year. The Center is the sole certified provider of services for victims of domestic violence and sexual assault in San Joaquin County, and operates the only undisclosed emergency shelters for battered women and their children.
The agency also provides prevention education and community outreach to numerous local schools, businesses and organizations, to prevent more people from becoming victims and to help stop the violence.
The Women's Center is driven by its mission to provide a wide range of supportive, educational and crisis intervention services to victims of domestic violence and sexual assault, enabling them to regain control of their lives.
Mission
To provide a wide range of supportive, educational, and crisis intervention services to victims of domestic violence and sexual assault, enabling them to regain control of their lives.
Vision
The founding and continued vision of the Women’s Center of San Joaquin County includes:
A community where women can share ideas and feelings, examine their role in society, and learn to bring about change.
An environment conducive to growth and self-empowerment where women can teach and learn skills important for dealing with a changing world, and further community cross-cultural understanding.
A forum where women’s issues and concerns can be brought before the public.
A place where women, men , and children in need can find supportive services.
A catalyst for change pursuing societal goals of equity and self worth, working to insure the provision of quality services, community education, and new programs for women and children.
Goals
The Women's Center's goals are to serve and empower victims, raise awareness about domestic violence and sexual assault, dispel myths and misconceptions, and reduce violence in our communities. Ultimately, our goal is to eliminate domestic violence and sexual assault, but we work to ensure that our services are available as long as there is a need.
Be A Legacy creates awareness with Legacy Foundation Day.
Legacy Foundation Day is an opportunity for you to receive a 30 minute coaching session for free. In turn, we ask you to make a contribution of $30.00 (or more, it's up to you) to the cause, organization, or individual we've chosen each month that we support because they are also making a huge difference in the world.
We choose to model how simple it is to walk the talk, take a stand, and do something for another. And we invite you to join us.
Here's how it works.
• Every month we'll highlight on our blog the month's charitable focus.
• You complete the 'Give to Receive' form on the Be A Legacy website to request your 30-minute coaching session.
• After receiving your form, you will be contacted by one of our Be A Legacy coaches to schedule your session.
• Your session must be scheduled within one week of your request.• After the session, please make your donation. Simple honor system applies.
Here is some information on the Women's Center:
For more than three decades, the Women's Center has been the lifeline to help and hope for thousands of women, children, and men in San Joaquin County, and now reaches over 30,000 individuals each year. The Center is the sole certified provider of services for victims of domestic violence and sexual assault in San Joaquin County, and operates the only undisclosed emergency shelters for battered women and their children.
The agency also provides prevention education and community outreach to numerous local schools, businesses and organizations, to prevent more people from becoming victims and to help stop the violence.
The Women's Center is driven by its mission to provide a wide range of supportive, educational and crisis intervention services to victims of domestic violence and sexual assault, enabling them to regain control of their lives.
Mission
To provide a wide range of supportive, educational, and crisis intervention services to victims of domestic violence and sexual assault, enabling them to regain control of their lives.
Vision
The founding and continued vision of the Women’s Center of San Joaquin County includes:
A community where women can share ideas and feelings, examine their role in society, and learn to bring about change.
An environment conducive to growth and self-empowerment where women can teach and learn skills important for dealing with a changing world, and further community cross-cultural understanding.
A forum where women’s issues and concerns can be brought before the public.
A place where women, men , and children in need can find supportive services.
A catalyst for change pursuing societal goals of equity and self worth, working to insure the provision of quality services, community education, and new programs for women and children.
Goals
The Women's Center's goals are to serve and empower victims, raise awareness about domestic violence and sexual assault, dispel myths and misconceptions, and reduce violence in our communities. Ultimately, our goal is to eliminate domestic violence and sexual assault, but we work to ensure that our services are available as long as there is a need.
Mentoring Yourself
Mentoring yourself is another great tool. Do you know that it doesn't really matter how others see you as much as it matters how you see yourself?
Other people might be able to look at you and share that they can see your greatnesses. They can truly believe that you are compassionate, powerful, courageous and more. The challenge arises when you do not believe these qualities for yourself. Letting go of many opportunities because you say to yourself "they are not talking to me" or "I will let you know if I see anyone like the customer you are looking for". Are you looking inside yourself to see it that opportunity is for you?
What qualities are you going to commit to awakening every moment?
If you are not willing to acknowledge your qualities then you are not likely going to achieve your potential in life. Making it almost impossible to achieve your goals and dreams. Today is the day to mentor yourself. Mentor your old beliefs and transform them into a powerful voice inside of you that serves you moving forward. Awakening a quality to serve you and practice everyday until you are transformed into believing in it.
How are you going to mentor yourself so you are coming out a winner everyday?
Mentoring yourself takes effort and consistency. Your ability to do this begins and ends with your mentality. Your mind set is to be about serving your purpose and moving forward in life. What will you choose to tell yourself everyday? If you have negative self talk then notice that it is not moving you forward. Putting away the hammer and choosing to take action to mentor you can shift future generations.
As you mentor yourself you create space to mentor others. When you enjoy you then people enjoy being around you. Every contact with another human is an opportunity for a "Mentor Moment". How many "Mentor Moments" are you going to create today?
Other people might be able to look at you and share that they can see your greatnesses. They can truly believe that you are compassionate, powerful, courageous and more. The challenge arises when you do not believe these qualities for yourself. Letting go of many opportunities because you say to yourself "they are not talking to me" or "I will let you know if I see anyone like the customer you are looking for". Are you looking inside yourself to see it that opportunity is for you?
What qualities are you going to commit to awakening every moment?
If you are not willing to acknowledge your qualities then you are not likely going to achieve your potential in life. Making it almost impossible to achieve your goals and dreams. Today is the day to mentor yourself. Mentor your old beliefs and transform them into a powerful voice inside of you that serves you moving forward. Awakening a quality to serve you and practice everyday until you are transformed into believing in it.
How are you going to mentor yourself so you are coming out a winner everyday?
Mentoring yourself takes effort and consistency. Your ability to do this begins and ends with your mentality. Your mind set is to be about serving your purpose and moving forward in life. What will you choose to tell yourself everyday? If you have negative self talk then notice that it is not moving you forward. Putting away the hammer and choosing to take action to mentor you can shift future generations.
As you mentor yourself you create space to mentor others. When you enjoy you then people enjoy being around you. Every contact with another human is an opportunity for a "Mentor Moment". How many "Mentor Moments" are you going to create today?
Mentee -Are you willing to ask for a Mentor?
Who is a mentee? A mentee is a person that wants to further his/her career and/or social development. Signs that the person wants to progress are statements/questions such as: "I would like to make more friends.", "My teachers thinks that I can get better grades.", "I would like to get a better job.", "How can I get a promotion?", "How do I get on the basketball team?", "I want to go to college.", "I would like a better relationship with my kids or spouse. "
"I'd like to make more money in my network markting business. What do I have to do to make it happen?"
It is very difficult to help someone who does not see the need for help. You can suggest to someone that he/she can do better in a particular area, but the individual must appreciate and accept the need for change. They must see the value in creating a shift.
Mentees must have trust and respect for the mentor. Mentees must realize that the success of the relationship is up to them and they are responsible for the actions they take. Mentee's must take responsibility for their own development. Finally, the mentee must value the role of a mentor in achieving these objectives.
Maintaining the Mentoring Relationship with the Mentee
A key element in maintaining a good working relationship with your mentee is to ensure that he / she is responsible for his / her own development. The mentor can coax, persuade, cajole but must never coerce the mentee.
Honestly is always the best policy. Some things may have to be coated with some sugar and honey to sweeten them up, but never compromise the truth.
Being a mentor is a rewarding responsibility. Take your mentoring responsibilities seriously, and insist the mentee do likewise.
Do not hesitate to invite others to get involved in the mentoring relationship if you feel that it is in the best interests of the mentee. This step can be difficult for the mentor to take because it may admit to some weakness on his / her part. However, realizing when others can do a better job bringing is a hallmark of maturity.
Focus on the big picture and don’t worry about small things. Substance is important, style less so. Each person is unique, and the mentee’s individual style may need to be modified, but not suppressed.
The mentor should not look for immediate gratification in the mentoring relationship. The value of the lessons learned from the mentor may not become apparent to the mentee for months or even years later.
"I'd like to make more money in my network markting business. What do I have to do to make it happen?"
It is very difficult to help someone who does not see the need for help. You can suggest to someone that he/she can do better in a particular area, but the individual must appreciate and accept the need for change. They must see the value in creating a shift.
Mentees must have trust and respect for the mentor. Mentees must realize that the success of the relationship is up to them and they are responsible for the actions they take. Mentee's must take responsibility for their own development. Finally, the mentee must value the role of a mentor in achieving these objectives.
Maintaining the Mentoring Relationship with the Mentee
A key element in maintaining a good working relationship with your mentee is to ensure that he / she is responsible for his / her own development. The mentor can coax, persuade, cajole but must never coerce the mentee.
Honestly is always the best policy. Some things may have to be coated with some sugar and honey to sweeten them up, but never compromise the truth.
Being a mentor is a rewarding responsibility. Take your mentoring responsibilities seriously, and insist the mentee do likewise.
Do not hesitate to invite others to get involved in the mentoring relationship if you feel that it is in the best interests of the mentee. This step can be difficult for the mentor to take because it may admit to some weakness on his / her part. However, realizing when others can do a better job bringing is a hallmark of maturity.
Focus on the big picture and don’t worry about small things. Substance is important, style less so. Each person is unique, and the mentee’s individual style may need to be modified, but not suppressed.
The mentor should not look for immediate gratification in the mentoring relationship. The value of the lessons learned from the mentor may not become apparent to the mentee for months or even years later.
Mentoring -Are you willing to be a Mentor?
Mentoring is the art of helping others to develop their talents, aptitudes, and interpersonal skills and to reach their full human potential. Mentoring can take place in many settings, on the job, in school or college, in a club, within the community, in a social setting, and within a family.
A mentor is someone who resembles your vision of yourself in the future in some area. In common language, the person doing the helping is called the "mentor", while the person being helped is called the "mentee". However, this language hides the fact that mentoring is a mutually beneficial relationship - both mentor and mentee gain from their interaction. The characteristic of an effective mentor is that he/she is trusted and respected by the mentee.
Trust and respect create the foundation for open communication that is essential to a successful mentoring relationship.Other important characteristics of an effective mentor are:Self-awareness, knowing your own strengths and weaknesses.
Communication skills - a willingness to listen and an ability to communicate with the mentee.Openness to new ideas - Having a willingness to learn as well as teach.Patience. Perseverance. Honesty. Integrity. Commitment.A sense of fairness - observing & communicating both the positive & negative in a situation. Sensitivity to the mentee's strengths and weaknesses, intellectual and emotional development. An ability and willingness to work with the mentee on his/her challenges and needs.
For mentoring in work situations, the mentor may require technical knowledge (how to get the job done). This requirement will vary from need and requirement. In some instances it may be necessary for the mentor to teach skills to the mentee. If this is the situation, then the mentor must have the technical knowledge and the ability to communicate with the skills needed. In other circumstances, it may be sufficient for the mentor to know where and/or how the technical knowledge can be obtained.
Tip - This list of characteristics may seem to exclude many people from being a mentor. Not so! Awareness of the characteristics is more important than possessing them at the beginning of a mentoring relationship. Mentors can (and most probably will!) develop many characteristics while working with one or more mentees. We are all learning in life.
Establishing a Mentoring Relationship
Now that we have an individual who wants to grow as a person (mentee), and have selected a suitable mentor, (or mentors) the next stage is to establish a mentoring relationship.
While the mentoring relationship is an informal one, it is best to give it some structure.
There are three basic questions:
Where are we going, what is the desired goal?
Where are we now?
What do we need to do to get to the desired goal?
The mentor is best to lead a discussion with the mentee along the following lines:
What are the mentee’s desired goals?
What is the current situation?
What steps must the mentee take to reach his/her desired goal?
What resources for the goal are available to the mentee and mentor?
What resources need to be obtained from elsewhere?
Resources to be a better mentor include:
The mentor, Other mentors, Training Courses
The mentee (skills and aptitudes are identified through the personal profile).
Skilled professionals such as teachers, doctor and nurses.
Schools, colleges, universities, books, video and cassettes.
Parents, other relatives, colleagues, libraries and museums.
Government, government agencies, not-for-profit organizations, pastors, counselors & friends.
A mentor is someone who resembles your vision of yourself in the future in some area. In common language, the person doing the helping is called the "mentor", while the person being helped is called the "mentee". However, this language hides the fact that mentoring is a mutually beneficial relationship - both mentor and mentee gain from their interaction. The characteristic of an effective mentor is that he/she is trusted and respected by the mentee.
Trust and respect create the foundation for open communication that is essential to a successful mentoring relationship.Other important characteristics of an effective mentor are:Self-awareness, knowing your own strengths and weaknesses.
Communication skills - a willingness to listen and an ability to communicate with the mentee.Openness to new ideas - Having a willingness to learn as well as teach.Patience. Perseverance. Honesty. Integrity. Commitment.A sense of fairness - observing & communicating both the positive & negative in a situation. Sensitivity to the mentee's strengths and weaknesses, intellectual and emotional development. An ability and willingness to work with the mentee on his/her challenges and needs.
For mentoring in work situations, the mentor may require technical knowledge (how to get the job done). This requirement will vary from need and requirement. In some instances it may be necessary for the mentor to teach skills to the mentee. If this is the situation, then the mentor must have the technical knowledge and the ability to communicate with the skills needed. In other circumstances, it may be sufficient for the mentor to know where and/or how the technical knowledge can be obtained.
Tip - This list of characteristics may seem to exclude many people from being a mentor. Not so! Awareness of the characteristics is more important than possessing them at the beginning of a mentoring relationship. Mentors can (and most probably will!) develop many characteristics while working with one or more mentees. We are all learning in life.
Establishing a Mentoring Relationship
Now that we have an individual who wants to grow as a person (mentee), and have selected a suitable mentor, (or mentors) the next stage is to establish a mentoring relationship.
While the mentoring relationship is an informal one, it is best to give it some structure.
There are three basic questions:
Where are we going, what is the desired goal?
Where are we now?
What do we need to do to get to the desired goal?
The mentor is best to lead a discussion with the mentee along the following lines:
What are the mentee’s desired goals?
What is the current situation?
What steps must the mentee take to reach his/her desired goal?
What resources for the goal are available to the mentee and mentor?
What resources need to be obtained from elsewhere?
Resources to be a better mentor include:
The mentor, Other mentors, Training Courses
The mentee (skills and aptitudes are identified through the personal profile).
Skilled professionals such as teachers, doctor and nurses.
Schools, colleges, universities, books, video and cassettes.
Parents, other relatives, colleagues, libraries and museums.
Government, government agencies, not-for-profit organizations, pastors, counselors & friends.
Monday, July 14, 2008
What Is Commitment
Does commitment come when you say you are committed? Does commitment come when you think you are committed? How do you know you are committed? Is it just a feeling or just something you decide?
I attended a wedding this weekend and allowed myself to dive into what commitment is for me. So I took a glance at my life. I have been married to my husband for 15 years next month. We have been together for 19+ years. There have been many times when I was ready to leave the marriage and I know that my husband has felt the same upon occasion. So how have we made it through the last 15+ years without walking away? How has commitment shown up? Besides the obvious we are still together it has taken many times of truly choosing and acting upon staying married. We have consciously made a choice everyday to remain married. When times have been hard and circumstances have been difficult we each have made the choice in the moment to work through what ever challenges have come to pass. We have loved and hated each other through the rough times and still remained committed.
I use to come from a place that if I could make my husband mad and he left me then he would leave me on my terms! I would challenge his love and faith by pissing him off so he would leave while I was in control. He would just tell me that he married me for life and he is not going anywhere so I might as well knock it of. Trust me I tested that also. I will give than a lot of credit when it comes to commitment. He has taught me great lessons. Now mind you my husband is not perfect. Oh and neither am I! Yet we remain married in spite of ourselves.
What actions have we taken to be committed to this marriage? We have given each other space when needed. The space to cool off and rethink our circumstance. We have looked at ourselves and how we have reacted to what ever has come before us. We have sought out counselors to get us through some of the really rough times. We have re-chosen to our marriage at least a million times and will continue to do so. Every five years we get married again. We send out invitation, have a vow exchange and renew our commitment to each other. People ask me why we renew our vows ever five years and I tell them this. When we first married I knew just enough about him and was willing to marry him for what I knew about him up to that point. Every time renew I am vowing to accept what I now know about him. As we grow together and learn more about each other we can now say that I will marry you for all the weaknesses and strengths that have come to surface in the last five years. It is an opportunity to heal from the challenges and reward ourselves for the successes. I now desire the long term commitment with my husband and I have stopped testing him on leaving me. I enjoy being around him more and love to go just about anywhere with him. Our commitment has not only grown our marriage it has continued to grow our business. We have been in business together for over 15 years and it has been the actions that we have taken that continues to keep that business moving forward.
Commitment without action is just like a hope, wish and want. It is something we desire yet are afraid or lazy to take action on. Just waiting for life to happen around us and hoping we will survive is not very rewarding.
Commitment with action is work and perseverance. You will usually learn a lot about yourself in the process and will most likely be rewarded for your courage to take it on. Actions can be big or small and still it is a step with forward momentum. Commitment with action has a lot to do with people following you as well. The saying “do as I say not as I do! “ Those are the words probably of a lazy, non action person. I have found that when I am acting on my commitments people want to do the same. I am a leader and a follower of greater leaders. So be a leader of excellence and keep acting on your strengths and challenging your weaknesses until they become strengths.
Mind you all action steps may not seem like successes. However if you are willing to really look at the ones that were not successful and learn the lesson they have to offer then you will find a small success there too.
What are you committed to take action on? What actions will you take for yourself? Whether it is a job, a relationship, a goal for yourself or a dream what will you take action on today? What will you end the day with? A notice of action or a day when you felt like you did not make much difference because you chose to just wait for life to happen or you took action to create your life? Which one will feel better for you? I am choosing to take my life to the next level and with that I will continue to take actions in life. My desire is that you will join me and create the life you desire and be committed to yourself by taking actions for you!
I attended a wedding this weekend and allowed myself to dive into what commitment is for me. So I took a glance at my life. I have been married to my husband for 15 years next month. We have been together for 19+ years. There have been many times when I was ready to leave the marriage and I know that my husband has felt the same upon occasion. So how have we made it through the last 15+ years without walking away? How has commitment shown up? Besides the obvious we are still together it has taken many times of truly choosing and acting upon staying married. We have consciously made a choice everyday to remain married. When times have been hard and circumstances have been difficult we each have made the choice in the moment to work through what ever challenges have come to pass. We have loved and hated each other through the rough times and still remained committed.
I use to come from a place that if I could make my husband mad and he left me then he would leave me on my terms! I would challenge his love and faith by pissing him off so he would leave while I was in control. He would just tell me that he married me for life and he is not going anywhere so I might as well knock it of. Trust me I tested that also. I will give than a lot of credit when it comes to commitment. He has taught me great lessons. Now mind you my husband is not perfect. Oh and neither am I! Yet we remain married in spite of ourselves.
What actions have we taken to be committed to this marriage? We have given each other space when needed. The space to cool off and rethink our circumstance. We have looked at ourselves and how we have reacted to what ever has come before us. We have sought out counselors to get us through some of the really rough times. We have re-chosen to our marriage at least a million times and will continue to do so. Every five years we get married again. We send out invitation, have a vow exchange and renew our commitment to each other. People ask me why we renew our vows ever five years and I tell them this. When we first married I knew just enough about him and was willing to marry him for what I knew about him up to that point. Every time renew I am vowing to accept what I now know about him. As we grow together and learn more about each other we can now say that I will marry you for all the weaknesses and strengths that have come to surface in the last five years. It is an opportunity to heal from the challenges and reward ourselves for the successes. I now desire the long term commitment with my husband and I have stopped testing him on leaving me. I enjoy being around him more and love to go just about anywhere with him. Our commitment has not only grown our marriage it has continued to grow our business. We have been in business together for over 15 years and it has been the actions that we have taken that continues to keep that business moving forward.
Commitment without action is just like a hope, wish and want. It is something we desire yet are afraid or lazy to take action on. Just waiting for life to happen around us and hoping we will survive is not very rewarding.
Commitment with action is work and perseverance. You will usually learn a lot about yourself in the process and will most likely be rewarded for your courage to take it on. Actions can be big or small and still it is a step with forward momentum. Commitment with action has a lot to do with people following you as well. The saying “do as I say not as I do! “ Those are the words probably of a lazy, non action person. I have found that when I am acting on my commitments people want to do the same. I am a leader and a follower of greater leaders. So be a leader of excellence and keep acting on your strengths and challenging your weaknesses until they become strengths.
Mind you all action steps may not seem like successes. However if you are willing to really look at the ones that were not successful and learn the lesson they have to offer then you will find a small success there too.
What are you committed to take action on? What actions will you take for yourself? Whether it is a job, a relationship, a goal for yourself or a dream what will you take action on today? What will you end the day with? A notice of action or a day when you felt like you did not make much difference because you chose to just wait for life to happen or you took action to create your life? Which one will feel better for you? I am choosing to take my life to the next level and with that I will continue to take actions in life. My desire is that you will join me and create the life you desire and be committed to yourself by taking actions for you!
Monday, June 30, 2008
How Will You Celebrate Your Independence?
Is it time to accept freedom in your life...
Is your independence important to you?
Do you enjoy the freedom to speak what is on your mind?
Do you enjoy the freedom to choose your religion? Your Church?
How about the choice to join the military or work at a certain job?
How many children you choose to have?
How about the food you eat? And what you drink?
I have been to many places and have heard from others on how many areas the government decides how many kids you can have and what you can say. The kids at 16 (or younger) that automatically get put in the army to fight a war. I have been to places where the water is not good to drink and people have to fetch it and boil it before they can even taste it for their own safety. Where even in tragedy the government takes the food! Everyone must believe a certain way or they are killed. This is reality for some!
Today I say Celebrate! Celebrate that you live in an awesome country! I did not say a perfect country! Whether you like the government or not is up to you. And we as a nation have so much to be thankful for.
My question is what are you doing today or everyday to keep this country one of the best freedom places there is?
Are you reaching out to someone who is without food, clothing or shelter? Have you reached out to others and just offered your hand to help? Have you just listened as a friend spoke about a hard time? Have you reached out and given someone a much needed hug? Invited someone to join you at church? Have you accepted a hand out because someone cares? Have you reached for support because you are not alone in this world? Have you returned that phone call? Been that friend? Cared Enough?
I say as we celebrate this Independence Day we step up to our country! We act as if we are from the Home of the Brave and the Land of the Free and Be Brave and Free.
My challenge to you is to find and do 1 Random Act of Kindness A Day for 1 month! Are you up to the Challenge? Are you willing to Be the leader in a country that leads the way for so many other countries?
Enjoy your Independence and Celebrate with others and Enjoy Your Freedom!
Is your independence important to you?
Do you enjoy the freedom to speak what is on your mind?
Do you enjoy the freedom to choose your religion? Your Church?
How about the choice to join the military or work at a certain job?
How many children you choose to have?
How about the food you eat? And what you drink?
I have been to many places and have heard from others on how many areas the government decides how many kids you can have and what you can say. The kids at 16 (or younger) that automatically get put in the army to fight a war. I have been to places where the water is not good to drink and people have to fetch it and boil it before they can even taste it for their own safety. Where even in tragedy the government takes the food! Everyone must believe a certain way or they are killed. This is reality for some!
Today I say Celebrate! Celebrate that you live in an awesome country! I did not say a perfect country! Whether you like the government or not is up to you. And we as a nation have so much to be thankful for.
My question is what are you doing today or everyday to keep this country one of the best freedom places there is?
Are you reaching out to someone who is without food, clothing or shelter? Have you reached out to others and just offered your hand to help? Have you just listened as a friend spoke about a hard time? Have you reached out and given someone a much needed hug? Invited someone to join you at church? Have you accepted a hand out because someone cares? Have you reached for support because you are not alone in this world? Have you returned that phone call? Been that friend? Cared Enough?
I say as we celebrate this Independence Day we step up to our country! We act as if we are from the Home of the Brave and the Land of the Free and Be Brave and Free.
My challenge to you is to find and do 1 Random Act of Kindness A Day for 1 month! Are you up to the Challenge? Are you willing to Be the leader in a country that leads the way for so many other countries?
Enjoy your Independence and Celebrate with others and Enjoy Your Freedom!
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Legacy Foundation Day
July's Legacy Foundation Recipeint is Kids Inspiring Kids.
Be A Legacy creates awareness with Legacy Foundation Day. It is an opportunity for you to receive a 30 minute coaching session for free. In turn, we ask you to make a contribution of $30.00 (or more, it's up to you) to the cause, organization, or individual we've chosen each month that we support because they are also making a huge difference in the world. We choose to model how simple it is to walk the talk, take a stand, and do something for another. And we invite you to join us.
Here's how it works.
• Every month we'll highlight on our blog the month's charitable focus.
• You complete the 'Give to Receive' form on the Be A Legacy website to request your 30-minute coaching session.
• After receiving your form, you will be contacted by one of our Be A Legacy coaches to schedule your session.
• Your session must be scheduled within one week of your request.
• After the session, please make your donation. Simple honor system applies.
Go to www.kidsinspire.com click on the donation page and make your donation to support kids in Africa.
Be A Legacy creates awareness with Legacy Foundation Day. It is an opportunity for you to receive a 30 minute coaching session for free. In turn, we ask you to make a contribution of $30.00 (or more, it's up to you) to the cause, organization, or individual we've chosen each month that we support because they are also making a huge difference in the world. We choose to model how simple it is to walk the talk, take a stand, and do something for another. And we invite you to join us.
Here's how it works.
• Every month we'll highlight on our blog the month's charitable focus.
• You complete the 'Give to Receive' form on the Be A Legacy website to request your 30-minute coaching session.
• After receiving your form, you will be contacted by one of our Be A Legacy coaches to schedule your session.
• Your session must be scheduled within one week of your request.
• After the session, please make your donation. Simple honor system applies.
Go to www.kidsinspire.com click on the donation page and make your donation to support kids in Africa.
The Encouragement File
Today I ask that you create a file for yourself. You can use just a plain manila folder or you can create a piece of art for yourself. Decorate it with pictures, quotes designs or what ever your heart desires that will move you forward. Place somewhere you can access everyday if needed yet in a place it will be safe.
Every time you receive a compliment, a note of encouragement, a thank you note, an email with praise your job will be to put that in your File of Encouragement. Print out a copy of the email, write down the compliments that are told to you. Create a page just for compliments that you may have heard over the phone, face to face with another and when you find something you compliment yourself on.
If you are feeling like you need some encouragement on any given day or moment bring out this file and lift your encouragement bar. You are the master of your own encouragement. You are responsible for shifting your attitude to a place that serves you.
If your encouragement file is a little lean right now I would suggest you write yourself a few notes. Write down what you like about yourself. Write about a wonderful memory from your childhood. What are your gifts and talents? What are you good at? What do people admire about you? Fill your file with encouragement for your self to get you started. Your compliments matter also.
Catch yourself doing something right and then compliment yourself. Give your self credit! you can turn around a challenge and bring your self credit for doing something right in the challenge. Maybe you made a commitment to be somewhere on time and you were late. Acknowledge you were late, recommit to that person for next time and then compliment yourself for getting there instead of turning around and going home and giving up on your commitment. Many times we are used to bringing out the hammer and hitting ourselves for what we are not good at, made a mistake at or where we were not accepted. We will tell ourselves that we do not matter and beat ourselves down. Today I say stand up and put the hammer down and take on being the best encouragement for you.
If no one else is celebrating you right now you must step up and celebrate you! If you are not hearing people say nice things about you then you need to step up and say the nice things about you. Be your best encourager!
Everyone of us is good at something in this world. Whether you are a good listener, talker, public speaker or behind the scenes kind of person you are good at something. Drawing houses, constructing, writing, cooking, working with kids, working with elderly, shopping, teaching, caring and so many other great things to be proud of.
Today begin celebrating the greatnesses you have. When you do not see your greatnesses pull out your file and read through it. Every day or twice a day until you start bringing your encouragement up. You can not always rely on someone else to be there when you need them. So today you can step into being there for you when others are not available.
You matter in this world and even the small things you do in this world make a difference. You have gifts and talents that are only yours and it is up to you to use them for great things and even when life is discouraging you get to step up and re-encourage yourself to keep going. You deserve to life a fulfilling life. Do this for you because you deserve to feel encouraged everyday.
(This is a great tool to use with kids. Teaching them early will support them in life later on as well. School can be cruel so arm them with the tools to lift up their encouragement as well.)
ENJOY CELEBRATING YOU!
Every time you receive a compliment, a note of encouragement, a thank you note, an email with praise your job will be to put that in your File of Encouragement. Print out a copy of the email, write down the compliments that are told to you. Create a page just for compliments that you may have heard over the phone, face to face with another and when you find something you compliment yourself on.
If you are feeling like you need some encouragement on any given day or moment bring out this file and lift your encouragement bar. You are the master of your own encouragement. You are responsible for shifting your attitude to a place that serves you.
If your encouragement file is a little lean right now I would suggest you write yourself a few notes. Write down what you like about yourself. Write about a wonderful memory from your childhood. What are your gifts and talents? What are you good at? What do people admire about you? Fill your file with encouragement for your self to get you started. Your compliments matter also.
Catch yourself doing something right and then compliment yourself. Give your self credit! you can turn around a challenge and bring your self credit for doing something right in the challenge. Maybe you made a commitment to be somewhere on time and you were late. Acknowledge you were late, recommit to that person for next time and then compliment yourself for getting there instead of turning around and going home and giving up on your commitment. Many times we are used to bringing out the hammer and hitting ourselves for what we are not good at, made a mistake at or where we were not accepted. We will tell ourselves that we do not matter and beat ourselves down. Today I say stand up and put the hammer down and take on being the best encouragement for you.
If no one else is celebrating you right now you must step up and celebrate you! If you are not hearing people say nice things about you then you need to step up and say the nice things about you. Be your best encourager!
Everyone of us is good at something in this world. Whether you are a good listener, talker, public speaker or behind the scenes kind of person you are good at something. Drawing houses, constructing, writing, cooking, working with kids, working with elderly, shopping, teaching, caring and so many other great things to be proud of.
Today begin celebrating the greatnesses you have. When you do not see your greatnesses pull out your file and read through it. Every day or twice a day until you start bringing your encouragement up. You can not always rely on someone else to be there when you need them. So today you can step into being there for you when others are not available.
You matter in this world and even the small things you do in this world make a difference. You have gifts and talents that are only yours and it is up to you to use them for great things and even when life is discouraging you get to step up and re-encourage yourself to keep going. You deserve to life a fulfilling life. Do this for you because you deserve to feel encouraged everyday.
(This is a great tool to use with kids. Teaching them early will support them in life later on as well. School can be cruel so arm them with the tools to lift up their encouragement as well.)
ENJOY CELEBRATING YOU!
Friday, June 20, 2008
Motherhood Is Leadership
Motherhood is leadership! Motherhood and working in a business compliment each other. Motherhood can prepare us for compassion as well as vicious tiger like qualities.
With my first child I wanted everything to be perfect! I would boil the nipples of his bottle and pacifier. Everything was sanitized and cleaned daily.
With the second child I stopped sweating the little details. Cleaned the nipples and no longer boiled daily. Let him fall to sleep on a less rigid schedule and did not clean his face every moment. And the more I had the more I just let go of being stressed about being perfect. I gave birth to 4 children and they each have survived early childhood.
Many mothers will forget their own identity to put on the identity of a mother and even more so as a mother/employee or mother/business owner. Some times they forget they are also an individual who needs to also accept their own greatness and who they are meant to be.
After the kids are all grown and away from home the mother is very skilled with leadership qualities and sometimes they become confused with what to do with these skills now that the kids are gone and they may not feel any value left.
I want to support women in finding ways to see how what they have learned in being mothers to bringing those skills to the community and to businesses.
Whether you are a mother who is working away from home or a business leader in side your home you have great qualities in leadership to share.
Ask a few friends what they think your greatest qualities are that they have witnessed in you as a mother. Ask family members what they admire about you. Ask church members how they see you successful.
What have you worked with your kids?
Time Management - Prioritizing - Commitment to Responsibility
Patience and Listening Skills - Interpersonal Skills
Understanding - Endurance - Conflict Management - Balance
Negotiation Skills - Cleanliness and Manners
Decision Making - Budget Management - Project Management
Yard Maintenance - Catering Cooking and Preparing Menus
Some women must work to provide for their families.
Some women must work to help provide support for their families.
Some women work for security just to make sure there is enough for extras.
Some women work for the sense of accomplishment.
Some women work because they feel obligated.
Some women work because they feel they need to earn their way.
Some women work because they feel if they don’t then when their children grow up they will not have the skill and will have a difficult time finding a job then.
If you are a working mother why do you work? Do you also fill your time with taking care of you too?
How do you fine time to unwind and relax? Find a hobby for yourself?
Take a bath? Visit with friends?
Get involved with your church and/or community organization?
No matter whether you are parenting, working, exercising, playing, building a business be intentional about what you are doing. Are you working to your fullest potential? Are you parenting to your fullest potential? In all you do Be Intentional!
With my first child I wanted everything to be perfect! I would boil the nipples of his bottle and pacifier. Everything was sanitized and cleaned daily.
With the second child I stopped sweating the little details. Cleaned the nipples and no longer boiled daily. Let him fall to sleep on a less rigid schedule and did not clean his face every moment. And the more I had the more I just let go of being stressed about being perfect. I gave birth to 4 children and they each have survived early childhood.
Many mothers will forget their own identity to put on the identity of a mother and even more so as a mother/employee or mother/business owner. Some times they forget they are also an individual who needs to also accept their own greatness and who they are meant to be.
After the kids are all grown and away from home the mother is very skilled with leadership qualities and sometimes they become confused with what to do with these skills now that the kids are gone and they may not feel any value left.
I want to support women in finding ways to see how what they have learned in being mothers to bringing those skills to the community and to businesses.
Whether you are a mother who is working away from home or a business leader in side your home you have great qualities in leadership to share.
Ask a few friends what they think your greatest qualities are that they have witnessed in you as a mother. Ask family members what they admire about you. Ask church members how they see you successful.
What have you worked with your kids?
Time Management - Prioritizing - Commitment to Responsibility
Patience and Listening Skills - Interpersonal Skills
Understanding - Endurance - Conflict Management - Balance
Negotiation Skills - Cleanliness and Manners
Decision Making - Budget Management - Project Management
Yard Maintenance - Catering Cooking and Preparing Menus
Some women must work to provide for their families.
Some women must work to help provide support for their families.
Some women work for security just to make sure there is enough for extras.
Some women work for the sense of accomplishment.
Some women work because they feel obligated.
Some women work because they feel they need to earn their way.
Some women work because they feel if they don’t then when their children grow up they will not have the skill and will have a difficult time finding a job then.
If you are a working mother why do you work? Do you also fill your time with taking care of you too?
How do you fine time to unwind and relax? Find a hobby for yourself?
Take a bath? Visit with friends?
Get involved with your church and/or community organization?
No matter whether you are parenting, working, exercising, playing, building a business be intentional about what you are doing. Are you working to your fullest potential? Are you parenting to your fullest potential? In all you do Be Intentional!
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Mentor Moments
What is a mentor moment? A Mentor Moment is when someone comes into your life and offer you a moment of wisdom that teaches, coaches or steers you in a forward moving direction. A mentor moment can come from any source and may only be the only connection you will have. Meeting someone on an airplane, bus or train and they impart a saying, a tip or a direction that will support you in moving forward in your life is a mentor moment. You can create relationships with people who can provide you with many mentor moments or a one time mentor moment. Once you learn what you need from the person you go on about life and pass on your moments to others in the future.
You can also be the teacher of a mentor moment! Are you looking for ways to enhance other peoples lives? Do you have a piece of wisdom in the moment that could support someone else? Do you take the time out to see how you can impart wisdom into someone else’s life? Where can you coach, teach or steer someone in a forward moving direction? Where can you impart a bit of wisdom into the life of another? A family member, friend, co-worker, teen, child or a stranger?
I was on an airplane and spoke to a woman across the isle. She was reading a book I recently read and heard the author speak. We shared a few moments about the book and I was able to share with her my experience with the author. It was a nice exchange. We began talking about what we each do in life. She was intrigued with my share about coaching and supporting leaders. As we got off the plane she said she appreciated talking to me and I inspired her to go out there and teach others what she has experienced in her life. She is a retired professional team calf roper. She has won many awards and big belt buckles. She told me she was inspired to go back out to the roping industry and teach the newer people some of the lessons she has learned. What a great moment we shared.
Do you take the time to talk to the person next to you on local transit? How about in the line at the store, bank or doctors office? You never know who you are meant to impart wisdom into or who has a nugget for you. So go out there and create moments to be a mentor and receive mentor moments for yourself. I heard about "Mentor Moments" from a speaker who challenged the audience to connect and creating more of these moments in thier lives. I have since kept in touch with her and we have the connection to give and receive Mentor Moments.
You can also be the teacher of a mentor moment! Are you looking for ways to enhance other peoples lives? Do you have a piece of wisdom in the moment that could support someone else? Do you take the time out to see how you can impart wisdom into someone else’s life? Where can you coach, teach or steer someone in a forward moving direction? Where can you impart a bit of wisdom into the life of another? A family member, friend, co-worker, teen, child or a stranger?
I was on an airplane and spoke to a woman across the isle. She was reading a book I recently read and heard the author speak. We shared a few moments about the book and I was able to share with her my experience with the author. It was a nice exchange. We began talking about what we each do in life. She was intrigued with my share about coaching and supporting leaders. As we got off the plane she said she appreciated talking to me and I inspired her to go out there and teach others what she has experienced in her life. She is a retired professional team calf roper. She has won many awards and big belt buckles. She told me she was inspired to go back out to the roping industry and teach the newer people some of the lessons she has learned. What a great moment we shared.
Do you take the time to talk to the person next to you on local transit? How about in the line at the store, bank or doctors office? You never know who you are meant to impart wisdom into or who has a nugget for you. So go out there and create moments to be a mentor and receive mentor moments for yourself. I heard about "Mentor Moments" from a speaker who challenged the audience to connect and creating more of these moments in thier lives. I have since kept in touch with her and we have the connection to give and receive Mentor Moments.
Monday, June 16, 2008
Creating a Goal or Dream Board
Do you know what a Goal Board is? Do you know what a Dream Board is?
You can create a way to view and see your goals and dreams everyday by creating a visual of what you want or are committed to. Using magazines, newspapers, photos or what ever creative ideas you have to create a daily visual board. A collage of what you want to create for yourself and your loved ones that show your goals and dreams.
Some people will use a poster board to do this. Others will use a wall in their home or office, one wall of a cubical or utilized the refrigerator. I have heard of people who have painted a wall with magnetic paint so they can use magnets and add or take away what they put up on their goal/dream board. Be creative how you do this. This is something you will see everyday and remind you of what your goals and dreams are.
When you have your goals in front of you your subconscious sees this as the only option. You are constantly reminded of what you have set out to accomplish. A daily reminder of what is in your heart. The more you see your goals and dreams the more likely you will keep going in the direction of reaching your goals.
Why would you want to put your goals and dreams in front of you each and every day? Do you think it would support you in reaching your goals? Most people who set up goal and dream board are more likely to achieve their goals and dreams. Having a visual everyday keeps you more focused and therefore more likely to achieve.
Some ideas to add to your goal or dream board would include your dream home, car, spouse, children, jewelry, money, bank account totals, career, art, hair style, motorcycle, computer, Olympic gold medal and what ever else you dream of. You get creative and enjoy seeing your goals and dreams right before your eyes.
Why not give yourself the best possible chances to reach your goals and dreams?
You can create a way to view and see your goals and dreams everyday by creating a visual of what you want or are committed to. Using magazines, newspapers, photos or what ever creative ideas you have to create a daily visual board. A collage of what you want to create for yourself and your loved ones that show your goals and dreams.
Some people will use a poster board to do this. Others will use a wall in their home or office, one wall of a cubical or utilized the refrigerator. I have heard of people who have painted a wall with magnetic paint so they can use magnets and add or take away what they put up on their goal/dream board. Be creative how you do this. This is something you will see everyday and remind you of what your goals and dreams are.
When you have your goals in front of you your subconscious sees this as the only option. You are constantly reminded of what you have set out to accomplish. A daily reminder of what is in your heart. The more you see your goals and dreams the more likely you will keep going in the direction of reaching your goals.
Why would you want to put your goals and dreams in front of you each and every day? Do you think it would support you in reaching your goals? Most people who set up goal and dream board are more likely to achieve their goals and dreams. Having a visual everyday keeps you more focused and therefore more likely to achieve.
Some ideas to add to your goal or dream board would include your dream home, car, spouse, children, jewelry, money, bank account totals, career, art, hair style, motorcycle, computer, Olympic gold medal and what ever else you dream of. You get creative and enjoy seeing your goals and dreams right before your eyes.
Why not give yourself the best possible chances to reach your goals and dreams?
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Have You Heard of Becky Hammon?
Have you heard of Becky Hammon?
Becky Hammon is the basketball player from North Dakota who has been a professional athlete with the WNBA. At 31 years old she still had dreams of playing basketball in the Olympics. Half of her years playing basketball she spent in the US playing as a powerful team member. The other half of the year she was in Russia playing basketball as a powerful team member. When the opportunity came to play on the Olympic team Becky was ready to fulfill her dream. The challenge that has come from her accepting her dream and playing out her dream with the Russian team! The US team did not ask Becky to join the Olympic team until Becky’s allegiance was challenged. Becky had already made a commitment to the Russian team.
Becky since saying yes to her dream has been called a traitor, selfish and unpatriotic just to name a few. She has stated that she was raised to love her country, God and her heart is American.
I write this as I look at people out in the world going after their dreams. How many people will call others names because getting a goal or dream is suppose to look a certain way? How many people are wiling to take the heat? How many people will do what ever it takes to honor their dreams and goals? How many people will give up because they are called names? How many people are more committed to looking good, not offending others or worse yet giving up to satisfy others?
I am not talking about something that would hurt another human being.
I would like to just put out there that getting your dreams and goals is about what is in your heart. Are you worth getting your goals? My heart says yes. Can you handle the criticism that others may put out there? My heart say yes. No one is alone in this journey. Who are you going to put into your life to support you? Becky had two teams that she loved, respected and won for. The US team did not choose Becky on their team until her patriotism was challenged. Becky already had made a commitment to the Russian team. Besides all the negative comments and challenges Becky has remained strong in her commitment. Becky’s goal was to play basketball on an Olympic team. Is she unpatriotic really? Is she a traitor? Each person could be a judge and decide for themselves. I am going to leave that up to Becky and God. Becky said she loves the country that she was born in and still believes in the values of being an American. She also stated that the cold war was over years ago. This is about her dream to play basketball and she is reaching her dreams!
I say hats of to Becky for honoring herself and her commitments. What will you be challenged with to reaching your dreams?
Becky Hammon is the basketball player from North Dakota who has been a professional athlete with the WNBA. At 31 years old she still had dreams of playing basketball in the Olympics. Half of her years playing basketball she spent in the US playing as a powerful team member. The other half of the year she was in Russia playing basketball as a powerful team member. When the opportunity came to play on the Olympic team Becky was ready to fulfill her dream. The challenge that has come from her accepting her dream and playing out her dream with the Russian team! The US team did not ask Becky to join the Olympic team until Becky’s allegiance was challenged. Becky had already made a commitment to the Russian team.
Becky since saying yes to her dream has been called a traitor, selfish and unpatriotic just to name a few. She has stated that she was raised to love her country, God and her heart is American.
I write this as I look at people out in the world going after their dreams. How many people will call others names because getting a goal or dream is suppose to look a certain way? How many people are wiling to take the heat? How many people will do what ever it takes to honor their dreams and goals? How many people will give up because they are called names? How many people are more committed to looking good, not offending others or worse yet giving up to satisfy others?
I am not talking about something that would hurt another human being.
I would like to just put out there that getting your dreams and goals is about what is in your heart. Are you worth getting your goals? My heart says yes. Can you handle the criticism that others may put out there? My heart say yes. No one is alone in this journey. Who are you going to put into your life to support you? Becky had two teams that she loved, respected and won for. The US team did not choose Becky on their team until her patriotism was challenged. Becky already had made a commitment to the Russian team. Besides all the negative comments and challenges Becky has remained strong in her commitment. Becky’s goal was to play basketball on an Olympic team. Is she unpatriotic really? Is she a traitor? Each person could be a judge and decide for themselves. I am going to leave that up to Becky and God. Becky said she loves the country that she was born in and still believes in the values of being an American. She also stated that the cold war was over years ago. This is about her dream to play basketball and she is reaching her dreams!
I say hats of to Becky for honoring herself and her commitments. What will you be challenged with to reaching your dreams?
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Setting Goals Is Easy! Or Is It?
Setting goals is the easy step. People set them all the time. Many people set goals for a New Years resolutions. Setting goals, putting goals on paper, saying you will reach a particular goal does not mean you will succeed. Setting goals can be a lot like a hope, a wish and a want.
Acting on the goal is different than setting the goal. Acting on the goal requires you to do something about the goal. Putting goal accomplishments into action can be challenging for some. The biggest challenge could be being truly committed to the goal. What are the action steps you will need to take in order to be truly committed to the goal?
Get up everyday and get to work no matter what the circumstances are. You are tired, do not feel good or busy working are all great excuses to not work on your goals. However, they become great excuses for you to not be committed to your goal. To reach your goal you will need to get past all the great excuses and circumstances. When you allow all the excuses and circumstances to slow you down or deter you from reaching your goals you tell yourself that you are not worth reaching the goals.
Each time you set a goal, act upon reaching the goal and accomplishing the goal you tell your subconscious that you matter. Setting and accomplishing goals reward you with greater confidence, acceptance and commitment. The value of letting other people know that you set and accomplish goals allows others to build trust and respect in you.
Setting and accomplishing goals is a great way to reward yourself and others around you. As you allow people to see you step into your life and you create success you also lead the way for them to do the same. They will want to achieve goals in their life as well.
Go out and make a bigger difference just by setting, acting on and accomplishing your goals in life!
Acting on the goal is different than setting the goal. Acting on the goal requires you to do something about the goal. Putting goal accomplishments into action can be challenging for some. The biggest challenge could be being truly committed to the goal. What are the action steps you will need to take in order to be truly committed to the goal?
Get up everyday and get to work no matter what the circumstances are. You are tired, do not feel good or busy working are all great excuses to not work on your goals. However, they become great excuses for you to not be committed to your goal. To reach your goal you will need to get past all the great excuses and circumstances. When you allow all the excuses and circumstances to slow you down or deter you from reaching your goals you tell yourself that you are not worth reaching the goals.
Each time you set a goal, act upon reaching the goal and accomplishing the goal you tell your subconscious that you matter. Setting and accomplishing goals reward you with greater confidence, acceptance and commitment. The value of letting other people know that you set and accomplish goals allows others to build trust and respect in you.
Setting and accomplishing goals is a great way to reward yourself and others around you. As you allow people to see you step into your life and you create success you also lead the way for them to do the same. They will want to achieve goals in their life as well.
Go out and make a bigger difference just by setting, acting on and accomplishing your goals in life!
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Setting "SMART" Goals
Why is it important to set goals?
Goals allow us to stay focused on what we are committed to achieve.
Setting goals connects us to our dreams for better jobs, homes and material items, relationships and connection in the world.
When you set and achieve a goal you tell yourself “you deserve it and you are worth it”.
Setting and achieving goals shows others that you are serious about the life you live.
Achieving goals allows you to build self esteem and fuels your passion in life.
Setting SMART goals is the best way to stay on track with a goal. Many people have set goals only to find out that they were really just a hope, wish or want and because they were not realistic they did not work. Once they do not work most people will say “see what is the point of setting a goal?” then they quit setting goals all together. When you set a SMART goal it supports you in being specific. Thus creating a space for you to really win with your goals.
SMART Goals
• Specific – This means get very specific with what you are going after. Example is do not just write “I want to buy a house”. Write specific details about the house you want. “I want a two story, five bedroom house on ten acres of land in city and state.” The more specific you are the less likely you will feel like you settled for less down the road. And being specific helps you really see what you want.
• Measurable – This means that there must be a way to measure the accomplishment of the goal you set. How do you measure a goal like “I have a #10 relationship with my spouse” verses “I have published my first book”? To publish a book is easy to measure because you can have the book in hand. Measuring a relationship can be done and you really have to put some creative thinking into measuring it. You want to allow others to hold you accountable to your goals, so measuring the goal is important in the success process.
• Attainable – This is something that many people may not pay much attention to. If you are over 25 and 5’10” tall setting a goal like I will be 6’tall in 1 month is not likely to ever happen. This is not something that is attainable. We can not change out height! So really paying attention to what you goals are and how attainable they are is key to setting successful goals. “I have released 20 pounds in 60 days” is something that is attainable.
• Risk Taking – You want to set goals that have some level of risk for yourself. When you set a goal without a risk behind it there is less of a sense of accomplishment. Putting risk behind a goal can keep you in tune with why the goal is important. You can ask yourself “if I tell someone about my goal is there a feeling they will not like it, support it or judge me?” This is a great indicator if there is a risk behind the goal. If you answer yes then it is likely you feel there is risk in setting and telling others about your goal.
• Timely – Setting goals with a specific time frame on them puts more edge to achieving them. I am committed to reaching goal A by specific date and time. Is a specific step in achieving the goal. Setting a time frame allows others to hold you accountable and you to hold yourself accountable. You will stay more focused on the impending event and more likely to reach the goal.
Big goals are great! Underneath every big goal is a lot of mini goals. You can make a Big Goals list and then break them down into smaller goals. Some examples would be: Buying a house – you may need to clear up credit score, start a saving account or decide where you want to live. So break the big goals down and then they do not feel so overwhelming and out of reach.
Lastly, make sure you let other people know about the goals you have set. As humans we are usually much more accountable to others than we are to ourselves. We are more likely to let ourselves of the hook for not reaching our goals. Yet when we know about others goals we will watch to see if they get them. Tell people what your goals are. Put them before yourself at work. Hang your goals somewhere you will see them everyday. Put them where others can see them. Display your goals at the office, in your bedroom or on your car dash. Where ever it is that you can see so you will stay in tune with what you set out to accomplish.
You can also hire an accountability partner. If you do not feel someone around you could hold you to what you set your goals to hire some support. An accountability coach will have great tools to support you in reaching your goals. They can be a great asset to get you started in your new goals setting and achieving life!
Goals allow us to stay focused on what we are committed to achieve.
Setting goals connects us to our dreams for better jobs, homes and material items, relationships and connection in the world.
When you set and achieve a goal you tell yourself “you deserve it and you are worth it”.
Setting and achieving goals shows others that you are serious about the life you live.
Achieving goals allows you to build self esteem and fuels your passion in life.
Setting SMART goals is the best way to stay on track with a goal. Many people have set goals only to find out that they were really just a hope, wish or want and because they were not realistic they did not work. Once they do not work most people will say “see what is the point of setting a goal?” then they quit setting goals all together. When you set a SMART goal it supports you in being specific. Thus creating a space for you to really win with your goals.
SMART Goals
• Specific – This means get very specific with what you are going after. Example is do not just write “I want to buy a house”. Write specific details about the house you want. “I want a two story, five bedroom house on ten acres of land in city and state.” The more specific you are the less likely you will feel like you settled for less down the road. And being specific helps you really see what you want.
• Measurable – This means that there must be a way to measure the accomplishment of the goal you set. How do you measure a goal like “I have a #10 relationship with my spouse” verses “I have published my first book”? To publish a book is easy to measure because you can have the book in hand. Measuring a relationship can be done and you really have to put some creative thinking into measuring it. You want to allow others to hold you accountable to your goals, so measuring the goal is important in the success process.
• Attainable – This is something that many people may not pay much attention to. If you are over 25 and 5’10” tall setting a goal like I will be 6’tall in 1 month is not likely to ever happen. This is not something that is attainable. We can not change out height! So really paying attention to what you goals are and how attainable they are is key to setting successful goals. “I have released 20 pounds in 60 days” is something that is attainable.
• Risk Taking – You want to set goals that have some level of risk for yourself. When you set a goal without a risk behind it there is less of a sense of accomplishment. Putting risk behind a goal can keep you in tune with why the goal is important. You can ask yourself “if I tell someone about my goal is there a feeling they will not like it, support it or judge me?” This is a great indicator if there is a risk behind the goal. If you answer yes then it is likely you feel there is risk in setting and telling others about your goal.
• Timely – Setting goals with a specific time frame on them puts more edge to achieving them. I am committed to reaching goal A by specific date and time. Is a specific step in achieving the goal. Setting a time frame allows others to hold you accountable and you to hold yourself accountable. You will stay more focused on the impending event and more likely to reach the goal.
Big goals are great! Underneath every big goal is a lot of mini goals. You can make a Big Goals list and then break them down into smaller goals. Some examples would be: Buying a house – you may need to clear up credit score, start a saving account or decide where you want to live. So break the big goals down and then they do not feel so overwhelming and out of reach.
Lastly, make sure you let other people know about the goals you have set. As humans we are usually much more accountable to others than we are to ourselves. We are more likely to let ourselves of the hook for not reaching our goals. Yet when we know about others goals we will watch to see if they get them. Tell people what your goals are. Put them before yourself at work. Hang your goals somewhere you will see them everyday. Put them where others can see them. Display your goals at the office, in your bedroom or on your car dash. Where ever it is that you can see so you will stay in tune with what you set out to accomplish.
You can also hire an accountability partner. If you do not feel someone around you could hold you to what you set your goals to hire some support. An accountability coach will have great tools to support you in reaching your goals. They can be a great asset to get you started in your new goals setting and achieving life!
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Life's Wonderful Questions
Who are you?
What do you want in life?
When is the last time you paid attention to what you want?
What kind of person are you?
Are you outgoing or do you tend to be reserved?
Can you motivate and discipline yourself?
Do you adapt to change or attempt to hide from it?
What are your strengths?
Do you enjoy your strengths or just use them for work?
Do your strengths bring out your passion in life?
What are your weaknesses?
Are you being honest about your weaknesses?
Do your weaknesses hold you back?
Do you find yourself hiding so others do not see your weaknesses?
Do you strive to turn your weaknesses into your strengths?
What are your hopes?
What is the future you see in your mind?
How is the future different from right now?
What do you like about the future?
What are your dreams?
Are they really your dreams or someone else’s?
Do you pay attention to the desires in your heart?
So what are you going to do with your wonderful life today?
What do you want in life?
When is the last time you paid attention to what you want?
What kind of person are you?
Are you outgoing or do you tend to be reserved?
Can you motivate and discipline yourself?
Do you adapt to change or attempt to hide from it?
What are your strengths?
Do you enjoy your strengths or just use them for work?
Do your strengths bring out your passion in life?
What are your weaknesses?
Are you being honest about your weaknesses?
Do your weaknesses hold you back?
Do you find yourself hiding so others do not see your weaknesses?
Do you strive to turn your weaknesses into your strengths?
What are your hopes?
What is the future you see in your mind?
How is the future different from right now?
What do you like about the future?
What are your dreams?
Are they really your dreams or someone else’s?
Do you pay attention to the desires in your heart?
So what are you going to do with your wonderful life today?
The Power In Saying No
Why would you want to say No to people?
Why is a No powerful?
No is a way to trust yourself. Trusting your insinct on making a choice.
When you say no to someone that is a way that you honor yourself. How often do you truly honor yourself?
No does not mean that you are a bad person or someone who does not care.
No is just saying this does not work for me right now. No I can not do this for you as I can not put anything more on my schedule.
This is about you honoring your previous committments and not creating overwhelm for yourself.
When you say no, I have found that some people will actually honor you more. They will respect you for having boundries and honoring who you are.
Now don't get me wrong some people will take advantage of you if you tend to not say no often. However you are the only one to blame for not setting healthy boundaries for your self.
No can be a very powerful statement! It can show that you pay attention to your life.
A no puts power in you feeling like you have a choice and you have the power to do what supports you best.
Can you say no and still say yes? No to what is being asked and you can put in a yes for the future. Like no I can not be part of the play this month, please do ask me again in the future. If I am available I will let you know. This is a way that shows you are still open to supporting others yet is just does not work at this time. This allows you to have the control in your life and honor yourself and be there when others can use your support.
So what lessons can you take from saying no?
Why is a No powerful?
No is a way to trust yourself. Trusting your insinct on making a choice.
When you say no to someone that is a way that you honor yourself. How often do you truly honor yourself?
No does not mean that you are a bad person or someone who does not care.
No is just saying this does not work for me right now. No I can not do this for you as I can not put anything more on my schedule.
This is about you honoring your previous committments and not creating overwhelm for yourself.
When you say no, I have found that some people will actually honor you more. They will respect you for having boundries and honoring who you are.
Now don't get me wrong some people will take advantage of you if you tend to not say no often. However you are the only one to blame for not setting healthy boundaries for your self.
No can be a very powerful statement! It can show that you pay attention to your life.
A no puts power in you feeling like you have a choice and you have the power to do what supports you best.
Can you say no and still say yes? No to what is being asked and you can put in a yes for the future. Like no I can not be part of the play this month, please do ask me again in the future. If I am available I will let you know. This is a way that shows you are still open to supporting others yet is just does not work at this time. This allows you to have the control in your life and honor yourself and be there when others can use your support.
So what lessons can you take from saying no?
- Learn how to say no to people.
- Don’t be afraid, you’ve got nothing to be afraid of.
- If you think you want to say no then say it.
- People may not like to be told no, but they will respect you for standing up for you.
- Ano can mean not at this time please ask me again in the future.
Today is your day to say No! A loving, compassionate and healthy No! Practice on small things and work your way up to the bigger No's. What is the gain in saying no? It is up to you to find out!
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Commitment verses Compliance
Have you ever been in a place where you had to do a job that you really did not want to do? The price for not doing the job was too great so you just did it? Did you do that job because you were committed to getting that particular task done? Or did you do the task to avoid a negative consequence? Did you get the task done out of compliance? Or commitment? Many times people will make comments like "I had to to that or I might lose my job". Or maybe something like "If I didn't do blank then my spouse would be mad at me". Those are both statements out of compliance. Getting others to to what you want them to do where both side feel like they won is coming from a place of commitment.
Commitment usually comes from a place of enrolling someone to do something because they know the reward in the end is worth it.
Compliance usually comes from a place of a threat or fear of losing something and it may get done and someone feels they paid a big price.
Where do you feel like you come from commitment or compliant?
When you are asked to do something do you feel like you have a choice in doing the task? Do you feel like you are winning it what you are doing? Do you feel like both sides are winning? In a marriage do you compromise so both sides win? Do you do things that you might not do for the average person just because you are married?
If you can answer yes to these questions then know that this is the place where commitment comes from.
If your answer is no then you will want to look to see where you are being compliant.
When you are coming from a place of compliance you may feel like you are a victim or uncared about. You may feel alone or that it doen't matter anyway the Eeyore syndrome. Many people will come from compliance because they may not know how to say no. (See upcoming blog for how to say no.)
When you are coming from a place of commitment you may feel satisfied and like you have a say in the choice you made. You may feel as part of the team and that what you hve to say does matter.
Notice when you are coming from compliance or commitment. Which will serve you best?
Commitment usually comes from a place of enrolling someone to do something because they know the reward in the end is worth it.
Compliance usually comes from a place of a threat or fear of losing something and it may get done and someone feels they paid a big price.
Where do you feel like you come from commitment or compliant?
When you are asked to do something do you feel like you have a choice in doing the task? Do you feel like you are winning it what you are doing? Do you feel like both sides are winning? In a marriage do you compromise so both sides win? Do you do things that you might not do for the average person just because you are married?
If you can answer yes to these questions then know that this is the place where commitment comes from.
If your answer is no then you will want to look to see where you are being compliant.
When you are coming from a place of compliance you may feel like you are a victim or uncared about. You may feel alone or that it doen't matter anyway the Eeyore syndrome. Many people will come from compliance because they may not know how to say no. (See upcoming blog for how to say no.)
When you are coming from a place of commitment you may feel satisfied and like you have a say in the choice you made. You may feel as part of the team and that what you hve to say does matter.
Notice when you are coming from compliance or commitment. Which will serve you best?
Friday, May 2, 2008
Confidence Stealers - Who wins?
The people you have the most contact with will have either a positive or negative affect on your levels of self-esteem and confidence.
Do you allow them to steal your confidence?
How do the people around you make you feel?
Happy and joyful to be around? They walk into a room and everyone else’s attitude has a positive affect? People are excited to see them.
Negative thinkers who never see opportunities? Drain your energy and bring you down to their level? You want to look busy to get away from them?
What affect would you say your family has on you?
So to make sure the people you hang around empower and support what you stand for here are some tips:
1. You have the power to choose who you hang around with. Ideally you want to be with happy, vibrant and positive people. They want to be around you.
2. If you have friends who are most often negative and you still want to be around them let them know how you feel. True friends will respect you. Just acknowledge that this is what they are like and block out the negativity.
3. The same can be said for family. We might not know how they got that way so appreciate where they came from and again block out the negativity.
4. Remember, nothing has meaning in life except the meaning that you give it!
Do you allow them to steal your confidence?
How do the people around you make you feel?
Happy and joyful to be around? They walk into a room and everyone else’s attitude has a positive affect? People are excited to see them.
Negative thinkers who never see opportunities? Drain your energy and bring you down to their level? You want to look busy to get away from them?
What affect would you say your family has on you?
So to make sure the people you hang around empower and support what you stand for here are some tips:
1. You have the power to choose who you hang around with. Ideally you want to be with happy, vibrant and positive people. They want to be around you.
2. If you have friends who are most often negative and you still want to be around them let them know how you feel. True friends will respect you. Just acknowledge that this is what they are like and block out the negativity.
3. The same can be said for family. We might not know how they got that way so appreciate where they came from and again block out the negativity.
4. Remember, nothing has meaning in life except the meaning that you give it!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Confidence
Do you struggle with confidence? Who do you see when you look in the mirror? Is the person you see strong and confident? Do you like the person you see?
A few steps to boost your confidence.
Think about a person that you see as confident and act, talk and walk like them. Model their mannerisms and behavior. It works for them; it will work for you!
Smile a lot! This doesn't mean putting a silly grin on your face. It does mean smile more when you walk down the street, when you meet people and just be happier in general even if you are not feeling that way.
Are you prepared for situations? Are you prepared enough to meet any challenge that may come up? Are you prepared for the meeting, the presentation, the job interview, when you meet someone for the first time? If not, get prepared. The more prepared you are the better confidence you will have.
Learn how to say no to people. Don't be afraid, there is nothing to be afraid of. If you think you want to say no to someone say it. People may not like to be told no, but they will respect you for standing up for you.
No one else can be confident for you! This is your job! You are meant for greatness so step into your confidence today and teach others how to be confident. You may be the person someone else brings to mind to model!
A few steps to boost your confidence.
Think about a person that you see as confident and act, talk and walk like them. Model their mannerisms and behavior. It works for them; it will work for you!
Smile a lot! This doesn't mean putting a silly grin on your face. It does mean smile more when you walk down the street, when you meet people and just be happier in general even if you are not feeling that way.
Are you prepared for situations? Are you prepared enough to meet any challenge that may come up? Are you prepared for the meeting, the presentation, the job interview, when you meet someone for the first time? If not, get prepared. The more prepared you are the better confidence you will have.
Learn how to say no to people. Don't be afraid, there is nothing to be afraid of. If you think you want to say no to someone say it. People may not like to be told no, but they will respect you for standing up for you.
No one else can be confident for you! This is your job! You are meant for greatness so step into your confidence today and teach others how to be confident. You may be the person someone else brings to mind to model!
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