Am I Comparing Myself Fairly?

Do I compare myself fairly with others? I find I am frequently comparing myself to others. Not smart enough, not skinny enough, not strong enough, not talented enough, not relaxing enough, not disciplined enough, not brave enough and so on and so on!

Are you caught in this cycle of Not Enough? I am successful and powerful! I have accomplished many things in life as well as many lessons. I have moved up in business and have some wonderful personal relationships. Yet I still sometimes go to the not enough thoughts.

The question I would put out is this "What scale are you measuring yourself on?". Are you comparing yourself to a hope of perfection? Are your successes rarely enjoyed? Do you constantly have the drive that you must do or be better? Do you see something that you did not do well as a failure and then focus on that?

If I have given 100 percent of my skill and knowledge to a project and when it is complete I look back and see where I could have done things differently how do I treat myself? I can look back and decide that the job I did was only 97% worth and the 3% is what I would focus on as not enough.

Have I allowed the influence of others to determine who I am or "should" be? Have I allowed my parents limited skill, my family, spouse, community and culture define who I am?
Am I allowing things I heard in my youth and interpreted in my youth create a negative effect on me now in my adulthood? How are you doing in this area?

Now is the time to start comparing myself fairly! The next time we get in the mood to compare lets stop and see what scale we are using. When you are feeling like you are not enough ask what scale are you using. The perfection scale that does not really exist?

Start listing your achievements and compare them to others who are the same age, gender, social background and culture. Are you comparing your physical beauty to someone else that does not live in your body or your life style? Write down the differences. Notice the similarities and differences for yourself. Notice the negative comparisons you place on yourself and how much energy you put on worrying about them. If you were to release that energy and put it somewhere more productive where would you put it? In your relationships with your spouse, kids, friends or at work, your business? How about positively on yourself? How do you hold back the real you from playing full out because you do not see yourself as enough?

Some things to think about and journal on could be:
• Is it possible to accept myself and treat myself in a lovingly and compassionately, regardless of my accomplishments or lack of accomplishments?
• When did I decide I was not enough and why?
• Do I need to be outstanding, special or unique?
• Am I looking to prove something? And if so who?
• Why does failing at something transform me into being a failure?
• What would my life be like with a fair comparison?
• Can I be satisfied with progress, not perfection?

Final thought: Did you know that the composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart by th age of 12 was more successful by any standard in music composition. Mozart spoke 15 languages and had composed numerous major pieces of music, including an opera. He was still a child! I would not want to compare myself to that!